Mama Drama

Tonight's Prayers

2012-01-17T17:39:00.000-08:00

Jackson: ...and please help us to make good choices so Hebbenly Fadder won't get angry wiff us. So He won't say, "Jackson, why were you such a meanie today? And don't be a crybaby!"

Sam: ...and pweese bwess Mama and pweese bwess Daddy and pweese bwess Dasson and pweese bwess Baby "Owlie" and dank-you Mama and dank-you Daddy and dank-you Dasson and Dank-you Baby "Owlie" and dank-you Abby and dank-you Mrs. Spah-kowl-nose (Abby and Mrs. Sparklenose from Sesame Street's Flying Fairy School segement) and dank-you pwophet (prophet) and dank-you scwip-chooas (scriptures) and dank you pwophet and dank you scwip-chooas (AGAIN) and help Baby "Owlie" be healfy so she wont' be sick and pweese bwess GwandMollie so she won't be sick anymore eeeder. In-a name of Jeesh ChrIsh. Amen.

Proud (and entertained) Mama. :)

The Mountain Laurel...

2012-01-07T17:43:00.000-08:00

http://www.satterwhite-log-homes.com/g4/pages/photos/slh11779.html#top

When Ben completes residency and can practice on his own, this is the house we are looking at building. He has always dreamed of a owning a log cabin on some land. We'd like to build it on a hill somewhere in Sherman. I love the huge open spaces on the inside (You can look at more pictures/blueprints on the Satterwhite website.) and the rustic look. I love the porches and balconies, the double staircase, and the outdoor fireplace. It even has an optional basement where Ben could have a man cave to sleep during the day when he has to work nights, but we'd have to find a place where the water table is higher because around here you can't have a basement or it'd fill with water. We looked at it in more detail when we went to the log cabin show a few days after Ally was born. The only thing I would change is the wood color. I want a darker wood, I hate this yellow pine wood. Yick! What do you think? Super big for a family of 5, I know, but you never know...we might still be expanding our family and if we don't (not making an announcement here people, I JUST had a baby, lol), it'd be a great place to have our big family holiday gatherings. We'll see what happens, but it is fun to dream for now...

A Very Blake Christmas 2011

2011-12-23T18:52:00.000-08:00

This year Ben has to work on Christmas Day, so for the first time in the Blake family history, we did not spend Christmas in Tulsa with our families. We opted to stay here and have a little family celebration in our house today, December 23, because Ben had all day off yesterday and didn't have to go to work until 6pm tonight.

Our "weekend" started with Ben coming home from work around 4pm on Wednesday night (early, YAY!). We made a family trip to the Azle Wal-mart to pick up the boys' big Santa present (which was covered up in the back of the Armada and they were watching The Polar Express on the DVD players, completely oblivious to what was behind them). Then we dropped it off at home and went to Taste of Italy off of Boat Club Rd for dinner. We had never been there, but Ben and I have an intense love for real Italian style cheese pizza, so we decided to test it out. It was pretty good!

Our Christmas Eve day began with me heading up to Wal-mart with all 3 kiddos to do a little grocery shopping. I left the house by 10am and was done by 11:30, and it was on Thursday the 22nd, so it wasn't too bad as far as crowds go, and my kiddos were pretty good, but if I ever have to take them all on major trips, I bribe them with check-out chips to share if they are good all through the store while we shop. They rarely get chips, so this is a great bribe. :)

Why did I take all 3 kids when Ben was home, you ask? So he could sleep. Yesterday was the ONLY day off he has had/will get for the entire month of December. He works AT LEAST 12 hour shifts every day (once worked a 20 hour shift) and is on call every 4th day. Anyway, he needed to catch up on his sleep. He slept till noon, then took a nap at around 3pm. He deserved it!

Later that night, we dined on fajitas and did a lesson out of our December daily Christmas lesson. It was about why we see stars on the top of our trees and in decorations at Christmastime. Then we read a scripture from Luke and sang We Three Kings. After I got Sam in bed, Jackson and I put Christmas cookies and milk out for Santa.

Once we go the kids to sleep, Ben and I did the usual Christmas Eve work of wrapping a couple last minute presents, stuffings stockings and putting out Santa presents. From Santa, the boys got a blue Ford F-150 Raptor Power Wheel and a cap gun set (not my idea) to share, Jackson got his Thor hammer he has been asking Santa for every time he sits on his lap ("...you know, Santa? The one that Archer has...", Sam got an Optimus Prime Transformer and Ally got a mat/activity center to play with when she is laying on her back.

A tradition at our house that continued on from Ben's childhood is that on Christmas Eve we make a sheet maze for the boys to go through to get to the presents. That way they can't see what Santa brought them right away, they have to go through the Christmas lights lighted maze to get to the tree to see their presents. It adds to the excitement and suspense, and makes lean Christmases more fun (not that this year was a lean Christmas, but last year kind of was.)

On our Christmas morning, Sam was the first one up, as usual. He came in our room at about 7am, and since everyone else was still asleep and he couldn't get downstairs because the gate at the top of the stairs was locked, I put a movie on for him. Jackson woke up around 7:30, and forgetting it was Christmas (?!), he sat down to watch the movie with Sam. When Ben and I heard them both up, we got up and led them downstairs to the maze. (Ben ran ahead and turned on the lights and got the video camera, while I stayed behind to lead them through slowly.) Note: Ally slept last night from 8pm till 3 am, woke up for a total of 15 minutes to eat, burp and get a diaper change, then slept till 8:30am! Saaaa-weeeet!!!

Santa left a note for the boys telling them that since they had been such good big brothers to their new sister, he had brought them a very special present, but they had to take good care of it and immediately start being good for NEXT Christmas! They were in awe as I read it to them! :) They ripped off the bow and sheet and were in shock for a few seconds and then they scrambled to climb in the Raptor truck. We had to unplug the battery because Jackson was trying to take off in it in the middle of the dining room!

Next we opened the other Santa presents and of course, there was excitement all around. Superheroes and Transformers are the thing in our house this year, so no one was disappointed. We then moved to open the presents from Mom and Dad. Both boys got a new pair of PJs, a Superhero shirt (J got Captain America; S got Superman), a Superhero mask (J got Wolverine; S got Captain America), and a building starter set (S got a Trio set; J got his first real Lego set), then Sam got a foot high Captain America guy and a stuffed Mickey Mouse (He loves MM Clubhouse.), Jackson got a Lego Police car kit and a bucket of Army guys. They each also got 2 movies (Cars 2, Bugs' Life, Monsters Inc, and Lion King) and Jackson got a new game for his MobiGo (which they really share). In their stockings they got Superhero bubble bath, a few small Superhero action figures and a lot of candy. They were two happy little boys!!

After we opened presents, the boys and daddy went outside to drive the Raptor truck while I made blueberry pancakes and bacon and fed Ally (who had finally woken up). Some of us couldn't stand to leave the toys for a second, so they joined us for breakfast. (Normally this is against the rules, but...it's Christmas!!)

Next, Daddy played with Ally for a bit, while the boys played with their new toys and I cleaned up the kitchen. Then Sam so graciously offered to open Ally's gifts for her since she couldn't do it yet. hehe, I think he enjoyed the opening part more than the playing part! Although he was a little disappointed to open 2 boxes of rice cereal, diapers, wipes and an assortment of level 1 baby food. Not too exciting...I don't think he'd trade Ally. :)

The best part was when Jackson and Ben sat down to put his Lego Police Car kit together. I'm not sure who enjoyed that father-son time more, J or Ben.

While they did that, Sam and I built a cool house with his Trio Set. It had a garage door that lifted up and everything! (I didn't get a picture of that.) We played with the car that came with the set and a Batman guy and car that we already had. They went in and out of the house and then back out to fight bad guys over and over again!

The boys basically played upstairs with almost NO fighting all day. Then we had a thrown together fairly last minute Christmas dinner of turkey, mashed potatoes and gravy, green bean casserole and sugar cookies for dessert. (I don't know why I hadn't thought to make a Christmas dinner ahead of time. I guess I was just too busy doing all the Christmas shopping since I had to do it all by myself this year.) I was lucky I had a frozen Jennie-O turkey breast in my freezer that could go straight in the oven and be done in a hour and a half!

We were sad when Ben had to go back to work, and we won't see him much tomorrow since he'll need to sleep, but we will wait for him to get home from work on Christmas Day and then go out to Aunt Sara's for Christmas dinner and to play with Keagan and Levi (my cousin's boys, age 5 and 3). Then my family will be coming to Allen on the 27th. Our plan is to have another huge extended family dinner at my Grandmother Pat's house, then Meg and her girls and me and my kiddos will drive to Celina (N of Frisco) to spend the night at my Aunt Sara's. All the boys (sans Ben and Chris, my cousin) are going hunting in East Texas on our land so we will have overnight girl time and the kids (Keagan, Levi, Addy, Ella, Jackson and Samson - all between ages of 2.5 to 6.5) will all get to play. This works out perfectly since the 27th is the next day Ben is on call and will be at the hospital overnight and sleeping all day the 28th.

Kindness Coins

2011-12-18T10:30:00.000-08:00

One of my goals with my kids is for them to be nicer to each other. To stop making snarky remarks to each other like, "I am not your friend" or "I don't like you, Sam." or "You're just a baby." To change the tone of voice they use when they talk to each other. To share, even when you don't want to. To respect each other's belongings. To respect each other's wishes (especially when someone is asking the other to STOP). To generally have a more peaceful, loving home.

I also want them to think about others. Does anyone around you need help? Help them! Will that comment or action hurt someone's feelings? Don't say/do it! Do you like someone's shoes or shirt? Tell them! Is someone sad? Comfort them!

To encourage moments to exercise these beahviors, I am giving my kids "Kindess Coins" every time I catch them being particularly kind. We will keep them in a Mason Jar in the kitchen, and they can use them to buy special treats or privileges on Sunday. Of course the end goal is for them to be kind just because, but in the meantime, a little incentive for recognizing opportunites and practicing won't hurt, right? (Because yelling at them and punishing them is NOT a great example of kindness and it certainly does NOT promote peace in our home.)

Sam, 2.5

2011-12-15T18:22:00.000-08:00

Tonight Sam pooped in the potty for the first time! Like a real full-size poop. I was so excited!! I'm hoping this means we won't go down the major fear of pooping road that Jackson went down. Jack wasn't poop-trained until this summer when he was just a month away from being 4! And even now, we still have to keep a close eye on Jackson. He'll hold it in for a few days and then really get constipated and be afraid to finally let it out because it hurts a little.

As far as potty training goes, I really haven't pushed it much with Sam. We tried it out this summer, he didn't seem interested, so we abandoned it. Then a few months ago, he started asking to wear underwear, so we did for a short period of time during the day, then we'd go longer and longer periods of time. He still has accidents from time to time, but mostly he has the control thing down. His weakness is stopping play when he has the urge to go. He'll go potty if I tell him to, but if I forget and it has been too long, a lot of times he'll have an accident unless something reminds him he needs to go. But we have gone out to run errands for hours several times with Sam in underwear and he hasn't had an accident. And now, he pooped! Yeah! I think we are getting closer to having 2 out of 3 of our kids out of diapers! WHEW! Maybe one of them will get to go to college after all! ;)

Sam always surprises me with the things he understand and says. He very rarely seems only 2 to me. He plays with older kids a lot and they enjoy playing with him. He gets his feelings hurt when he gets left out because someone assumes he isn't mature enough to do what the big kids are doing. He has a very big vocabulary and not only talks, but makes jokes and expresses his likes, dislikes, things he notices, and asks me insightful questions a lot.

Just a few months ago, he was a stubborn toddler, but now he is my sweet and helpful almost-preschooler. He wants to do so much for himself and so much to help me all the time. He can dress himself (with a little help with the shirt, socks and one or two pairs of his shoes). He can strap himself into his own carseat. He helps me with the dishes and unloading the clothes from the dryer. He can get his own juice out of the fridge, and brush his own teeth. He also knows the alphabet, can recognize many letters, and can count past 20! He loves to color, so I hope his fine motor skills will be well developed when I start to sit down and work with him on paper soon. Recently I realized I didn't need to continue getting him out of the bathtub, drying him of and dressing him. He can do all that by himself now! This makes the bathtime/bedtime routine so much easier!! He is also such a big help with his sister! (See the Ally - 2 mos post a few posts ago.)

For a child who used to be the biggest daily trial for me, he is now one of my biggest sources of pride and joy. Oh he still has his moments, don't get me wrong. He is still a fairly stubborn eater. He still screams bloody murder when he gets frustrated or mad at his brother instead of using big boy words and asking for help, and he still craves a LOT of attention, but overall, I am so pleased with how far his behavior and demeanor has come in the last 6-9 months. We love you, Sam!

The Flip-Floppers, AKA the Always-Immediately-Change-Their-Minders

2011-12-14T19:12:00.000-08:00

When I was a little girl I loved this book!! Mrs. Piggle-Wiggle knows everything about children! She can cure them of any ailment. Patsy hates baths. Hubert never puts anything away. Allen eats v-e-r-y slowly. Mrs Piggle-Wiggle has a treatment for all of them. The incomparable Mrs. Piggle-Wiggle loves children good or bad and never scolds but has positive cures for Answer-Backers, Never-Want-to-Go-to-Bedders, and other boys and girls with strange habits. Well, Mrs. Piggle-Wiggle, I'd like to read the chapter on how you treat the Flip-Floppers! Let me describe the problem for you...

Scene: Samson at bedtime.

Me: Sam, what bedtime song do you want to sing?

Sam: Uhhhm...Choose da Right.

Me: (singing) Choose the right, when a choice is placed before you...

Sam: (interrupting) No, Mama! I don't want Choose da Right, I want I am a Child of God.

Me: No, you already picked Choose the Right and I already started singing
Sam: NOOOOOO! I don't WANT Choose da Right!!!
(...and the bedtime routine takes forever because the little stinker continues to throw a fit about the song.)

Scene: Jackson at snacktime

Me: Jackson, do you want an orange?

Jackson: No, I want fruit snacks.

Me: Fruit snacks are not for snack today. Do you want an orange or nothing?

Jackson: Nothing.

Me: Okay, but you will be hungry and won't get any more food till dinnertime.

(I walk away. 5 minutes later, when I am sitting down feeding the baby...)

Jackson: Mama, I DO want an orange.

Me: Sorry, son, snacktime is over now. I asked you if you wanted an orange, and you were mad that I wouldn't give you fruit snacks, so you picked nothing. Now I am doing something else and I am not close to the fridge. It's too late to change your mind now.

(a 45 minute temper tantrum ensues and JUST when I think it is finally over, Jackson comes downstairs and asks me for an orange again.)

Me: !!!!!

Please, Mrs. Piggle-Wiggle, if you are out there, I am eagerly awaiting your antidote for this annoying disease my boys have contracted. I trust in your wisdom!

P.S. I did not give in on either account. No new song for Sam and no orange for Jackson. And both were punished for the fit they each threw. I'm sick of this!

Ally - 2 mos

2011-12-14T14:39:00.000-08:00

This Tuesday Ally turned 2 mos old. I thought I'd briefly document what she is doing these days.

She loves to smile, and a few times she has even gotten so caught up in the smiling and trying to talk, that a happy little squeal slipped out.

She eats on avg 4 oz of breastmilk every 3-4 hours. Sometimes I get lucky at night and she goes up to 5 or 6 hours without eating, but that is rare.

She can hold her head up pretty well. We have put her in the Bumbo seat a few times, but she doesn't like it much. What she LOVES is her swing. She would happily spend all day in her swing, sleeping or looking at her reflection in the mobile above her.

She doesn't like tummy time much yet, I suppose because she feels trapped and there isn't much to do when you can barely hold your head up, and only for short periods. Most of the time she ends up with her face in a wet puddle of spit up. I can't say as I blame her on that one.

Her brothers love her, especially Sam. I am really surprised at that because I thought he'd be jealous. He is very sweet to her. When she cries, he rushes to comfort her. Today she got her 2 month shots and he raced to her side to tell it was okay the minute she started crying. He is also a very good helper when it comes to Ally. He'll get bottles out of hte fridge for me, grab her pacifier, put diapers in teh trash, etc. He is a gret big brother. Jackson is good, too, but most of the time he is pretty oblivious that we even have a new baby in the house. He is very caught up in his big-boy activities and preschool friends these days.

Attachment Issues

2011-12-11T20:21:00.000-08:00

Tonight I was cleaning up Ally's room. She doesn't sleep in it yet. She still sleeps in our room in her vibrating seat (don't judge - she loves it and she sleeps!!) since she still wakes up in the night to eat. Just easier. Probably once she starts rice cereal in a couple of months, she'll start sleeping through the night and then she'll go in her own room.

Anyway, I was putting away some boxes of the boys' outgrown clothes that I had stored in there until I could get to them, and I just got so sad! Does anyone else have issues with boxing up their children's outgrown clothes? I sort through them and remember the stages of their lives and the fun times I remember them wearing those clothes in, and suddenly boxing up old clothes feels so wrong! Like I am trapping a little piece of their childhood, and I will never get it back.

And don't even get me started on taking them to a consignment store! To have some snooty lady pick through them and then tell me my son's clothes aren't good enough and they can't take them. It'd be like her telling me my child wasn't cool enough or something. The clothing equivalent to not getting into some elite private school. Ouch. I don't think I could do it!

I know I am personalizing this, and it is silly. Someone please tell me you feel the same way...or I may be forced to seek therapy. ;)

Post-Baby Weight Loss, Round 3

2011-12-10T12:42:00.000-08:00

This is the part I hate. Food is my treat when I am pregnant. I figure if I have to be miserable for 9 mos, I should at least get to enjoy eating whatever I want whenever I want. So I do. With Jackson I gained about 50 lbs. With Sam 40. With Ally 35. Of course I lost about 15-20 right after having her, which means right now I weigh about 163. And I have since she was 2 weeks old. Not a lb lost since.

I had such a speedy recovery after having Ally, that I felt well enough to do light workouts since she was about 2-3 weeks old. I started with just 15 minutes a day on my elliptical and lengthened it each week. At 6 weeks, I started lifting weights and changed my diet. Tomorrow she will 8 weeks old and this is what I do now.

full body weights 3x a week, including leg lefts and crunches on the ball and 25 squats and 50 lunges for each leg
25-40 minutes on the elliptical every day
2 mile run 2x a week
30 min-1 hour of Pilates or Kickboxing every week
salad to replace one meal every day and a healthy, low-calorie, high-fiber breakfast (with a Diet Coke, lol)

Two days ago I finally lost a lb. It is such a fight to lose weight, and it gets harder as you get older.

Chicken Crescent Wreath

2011-12-07T15:37:00.000-08:00

The concept of the crescent wreath is not new, but it is new to me. I have never attempted one because it looks so pretty, I thought, it must be complicated. But I was perusing my Taste of Home annual Cookbooks, specifically the 2000 issue, looking for new recipes because my rotation is getting kind of boring, and I came across this recipe. Whether it was the tantalizing picture to the left of the recipe or the short, sweet and to the point recipe itself, something made me want to try it. We did, and we all liked it. Even Sam. Who eats dinner about 3 out of 7 nights of the week. I am sharing because not only was it super easy, super quick, and really yummy, but it has a lot of fresh veggies in it, and they are hidden by the cheesy, chickeny, bready goodness, so I tricked my kids into eating something somewhat healthy! Score!!

Chicken Crescent Wreath, pg 267 TOH 2000 Annual Recipes
2 tubes (8 oz each) refrigerated crescent rolls
1 cup (4 oz) shredded Co-Jack cheese
2/3 cup condensed creamof chicken soup, undiluted
1/2 cup chopped fresh broccoli
1/2 cup chopped sweet red pepper
1/4 cup chopped water chestnuts
1 can (5 oz) white chicken, drained OR
3/4 cup cubed cooked chicken
2 tbsp chopped onion

Arrange the crescent rolls on a 12-in pizza pan, (I used my Pampered Chef pizza stone) forming a ring with pointed ends facingthe outer edge of the pan and wide ends overlapping. Combine the remaining ingredients; spoon over wide ends of rolls. Fold points over filling and tuck under wide ends (filling will be visible). Bake at 375 for 20-25 minutes or until golden brown. Yield: 6-8 servings

My note: I receommend using a good brand of crescent roll dough. I bought the Great Value brand, and the flaky goodness just wasn't the same. I also used canned chicken because I was in a hurry, but I think it would be much better if you used fresh cooked cubed chicken breasts.

The Staller

2011-12-06T13:15:00.001-08:00

Do you have one of these children in your home? The child who, when you ask him to do something, finds everything else interesting on the way?

I just love my 4-year-old, Jackson. He is smart. He is funny. He is kind. But this boy is S-L-O-W to get anything done. Part of this is that he gets very easily distracted. But recently, he has discovered that he can buy himself time if he pretends he doesn't hear me or flat out ignores me until I MAKE him do what I asked. When I finally do get him to acknowledge that I have asked him to say, pick up his toys in the playroom, he'll appease me by picking up a toy or two until I stop focusing on him and move on to my next task, and then he'll find an extremely interesting piece of fuzz on the carpet or a great book he's been meaning to read. A half hour will pass, and I'll find him completely engaged in a full battle with his action figures, more toys on the floor than when I left him. Note: this problem gets worse if naptime or another undesirable activity is due to follow.

As a person who is very task oriented, I find this immensely frustrating! So I'll get angry, and break down the task, barking direct orders such as, "Pick up the Spiderman guy. Put him in the bucket. Now pick up the Ironman guy. Put him in the bucket." I'll stand over him until the entire task is complete and we are both irritated with each other.

I so don't want to be this mom, and *with a new baby and an active 2 year old* don't have time to be, but how do I ensure that what I ask gets done without having to monitor the entire operation?

Allyson Anne Blake

2011-10-31T11:01:00.000-07:00

Since she is 3 weeks old tomorrow, I figured it MIGHT be time to post about her birth!

Ally joined our family on October 11, 2001 at 6:27 pm. She was 6 lbs 12 oz and 19 inches long. Although she was born almost a full week later than her brothers, she was the smallest child born in our family, and the smallest grandchild in our extended family to date. When I originally found out I was pregnant with Ally, I was seeing a doctor in Denton, and the affiliated hospital did not have the staff and resources to perform a Vaginal Birth After Cesaerean (VBAC). However, shortly after, Ben started his residency and our family was covered under his insurance policy. I was able to switch to a local doctor who worked for JPS. Since JPS is a much bigger hospital, VBACs were an option, and my new doctor was very supportive of this option. As I was not eager to spend a long several weeks recovering from a c-section, I decided to try to the VBAC option. We set a c-section date for 39 wks and 1 day, and I was checked for readiness before going in the operating room. My doctor told me I was dilated to a 4 and completely effaced. He thought we could have a very successful VBAC! They wheeled me into a delivery room at 8:30 am, Dr. McRay broke my water and I was able to do the rest on my own, without any help of any labor inducing drugs! (I had made it clear that I only wanted to do a VBAC if my body could do it naturally. I have heard the risk of uterine rupture is higher if you force your body to do what it is not ready to do with labor inducing drugs such as pitocin.)

It went perfectly! With both of the boys, my labor was slowed down or (in the case of Sam) stopped by an epidural, so my doctor and I agreed that I would hold out as long as possible for the epidural. With the help of low doses of IV Morphine, I was able to hold off on the epidural until I was dilated to an 8, (there was a delay in getting the epidural though, due to how busy the labor and delivery floor was. The anesthesiologist was in another room before he could get to me, so there was about an hour of horrible labor pains after I had requested the epidural. That was my only complaint - it took a while to get pain meds when I requested them. My doctor came in and checked me one last time at 6:30 and said I looked ready to push. At this point, I was pain free (a new expereince for me in deliveries) and cheerfully agrred to push. After about 25 minutes of easy pushing, Ally was here! She was so small, I didn't even need an epesiotomy or any stitches!

This delivery was such a different experience from the vaginal delivery I had with Jackson. I felt everything with Jackson because my epidural wore off twice. I was in hard labor, pushing for 2 hours with Jackson. By the time he was here and they asked me if I wanted to hold him, I numbly mumbled "no" because I was afraid I would drop him. I was THAT exhausted that I didn't even want to hold my first child! I have foggy memories of the whole experience because I was so beside myself with pain and exhaustion. With Ally, I remember everything. It was like I was a more active player, and when she came out, I really got to experience the delivery of my child with a clear head. It was wonderful! Such a beautiful experience! I felt like I bonded with her immediately.

Because delivery was such a breeze, my recovery has been pretty speedy, too! I mopped my kitchen floor 3 days after giving birth, then Ben and I took Ally on our date to the Arlington Log Cabin Show when she was 4 days old. People were asking me if I just went in the back room and had a baby because she was so tiny! :) Then when she was 8 days old, we went on a family hike near Eagle Mountain Lake to have a picnic. I am really feeling great! I started working out a little last week (15 minutes on the elliptical), and plan to push it a little more this week (adding 5 extra minutes of cardio and light weights).

I just feel so blessed! I prayed so hard that I would have an easy recovery so I would be able to do all the things that my life requires me to do. Ben is gone so much and my family isn't nearby to help me all the time, and I hate depending on other people all the time to help me. It makes me feel like a helpless leech. Heavenly Father answered my prayer and then some! I have had the speediest recovery of anyone I know!

Since Ally was so small, we had to keep a close eye on her weight. She dropped down to about 6 lbs, 2 oz after birth, and was only eating 2-3 ozs at a time, but she was back up to 7 lbs, 4 oz last Monday at her 2 week check-up, and with the way she now eats 4-5 ozs every 2 hours (or less sometimes), I am certain she has gained even more since. She has already outgrown the preemie clothes she was wearing (which when we brought her home were the only clothes that didn't swallow her)! The first few days of being home, Ally slept 4 and 5 hours chunks at night, but now she is starting to get into a more regular 3 hour feeding interval. I miss getting that extra sleep all in one chunk, but I am happy that nursing is going so well and she is thriving. These sleepless nights will pass soon enough, I know.

Jackson and Samson are really sweet with her, and surprisingly, Sam is the more smitten brother. I thought I was would have to battle him since he is my child who just craves a lot of attention no matter how he can get it, but he is really sweet with her, asking to hold her and "be soft" with her all the time. Even when I am not right next to her, I watch him creep close to her and talk sweetly to her when she is fussy. He just loves her so much! Jackson is a bit caught up in his big boy activities and "fighting bad guys" to care either way about her. When he notices her, he is sweet with her, but most of the time, he lives in his own superhero world. :) He is very proud to tell people he has a new sister now, named Baby Ally, though.

So we have pretty much settled down into our normal routine now, albeit a bit slower than usual. Ben starts a 7-5 M-F schedule in the month of November, so he'll be home more to help in the evenings and home all weekend long! YAY! We have really missed him, and it has been a little challenging having him have such an erratic schedule when we first came home, especially after my mom left, but we managed just fine. Since he took off 10 days when Ally was born, he didn't have many days off the rest of the month of October. He had to work a required amount of shifts for the month or he wouldn't have completed his requirements for his residency program. So that's the story of how the Blakes went from a family of four to a family of FIVE! :)

Let's Wrap This Up...

2011-09-26T17:16:00.000-07:00

I realized last night that I really haven't blogged much about this third pregnancy at all. I almost never post very many belly pictures because I am not a fan of documenting my growing fatness. If I were one of those cute pregnant ladies who gains weight only in her belly, then maybe, but no...I gain mostly in my legs, butt, and face and it's just not pretty. It depresses me to look back on, so I don't. I think it has to do with the loss of control. I hate losing control. Pregnancy is a HUGE loss of control over your body. You have to limit what you do. You are tired all the time. You feel sick. blah blah blah...you know what I am talking about. Anyway, that being said, I think the Lord knew I just couldn't take the full fledged loss of control in pregnancy this go round, because Ally has been the easiest one so far (until recently). Here are a few facts about this pregnancy that I will share for record-keeping sake:

*I haven't gained nearly as much weight as I did with both my boys. I started this pregnancy at 143, and I am now, at exactly 37 weeks, only 176. Not too shabby considering I started both my other pregnancies at around 140, but almost hit 200 with Jackson and 190 with Sam. I am super excited to see how fast I can get it all off this time. I typically lose 20-25 lbs the first 6 weeks, so woot woot for that! (Another bonus is that it'll be winter while I am trying to get it all off, so I can hide a little extra chub for longer even!)

*I barely got sick at all the first few months with Ally. I almost never throw up, just get a little blah-feeling and a lot tired, but with Ally, I think I maybe felt blah for a few days (but a lot tired).

*With Sam and Jackson, I started feeling strong kicks and Braxton-Hicks at about 20-25 weeks, and with Ally toward the later end of that time frame, but not as intense...until now. Now she could take both of them. She is pretty strong and seems to be interested in pursuing gymnastics...all day and all night. Sometimes it can be even painful. Like she thinks she can dig her way out of my belly with her knee...in the same spot...over. and over. and over.

*With Jack and Sam, I started feeling totally miserable at about 32 weeks, maybe sooner (but I was a lot bigger). I am only just now totally miserable with Ally. I have always had this issue with once I get a certain size, my back freezes up, and when I get out of bed, my body threatens to not support me. I take a few stumbling steps every time I wake up to go to the bathroom in the night and especially in the morning, but after I warm up, I'm okay. With Ally, all that applies, but it has only just started happening in the last 2 weeks or so, and it lasts a good part of the day.

*I got anemic with this pregnancy, and never did with the boys. Go figure...

*I have been super tired these last few weeks. I lay down to rest for several hours almost every day when the boys do. My exhaustion level grew proportionally before, not all of a sudden and not so much.

*In the last few weeks, I have been fine and super energetic. Ben and I have been doing a lot of home improvements, and I worked right alongside with him...until I couldn't anymore, and it happened so suddenly.

*At my last doctor appt (36w, 2d), Dr. McRay measured me and said I was measuring 3 (cm? in? what do they measure the belly with? I dunno...) smaller than I should be, so he wanted to do a sono to check out Ally. After he checked her out, he said my fluids were fine and she looked fine, too. She is just small. He doesn't estimate her to be even 7 lbs yet. Both the boys were born at 38w, 2d and both were right at 8 lbs, so if she comes in a week and a half, she stands to be almost a full lb smaller. Sweet deal since I am planning on a vbac if all goes well.

*If I don't go into labor on my own in the next two weeks, we will see where I am at as far as dilation, thinning and descent and all that, and if I look ready enough, we will try to induce. If not, we will do the c-section, but no later than October 10. My doctor is going to be gone, and I don't want to have yet another dr deliver Ally after I have spent all this time finding a dr that I like. (Dr. McRay is my third dr this pregnancy since our insurance changed when Ben started residency.) Plus, Ben's vacation time starts on October 10 and we have out of town family coming in to help with the birth, so I'd like to control WHEN she comes as much as possible, while still trying for the vbac because I think recovery from a vaginal delivery is an easier recovery. (There's that whole control thing rearing its ugly head again...lol)

You know what else was easier this time around? Coming up with a name! With Jackson, Ben and I could not agree until almost the very end. Jackson is a name we both liked (but mostly me), and Garit is a throw to my mom's maiden name McGarity. Samson Jay is named after Ben's childhood best friend, and a super great guy that we hung out with a lot when we were dating, Keny Sams. Jay is Ben's middle name. Allison is Ben's mom's name, and I like it with a y to give her some individuality. At first, ben said he didn't mind it either way, btu now all of a sudden, he says he wants it with an i, so I dunno where we'll go with that. Anne, her middle name, is after both my grandmothers: my paternal grandmother Ann(ie) Marguerite McDonald Conroy, passed away in March of this year, and my maternal Grandmother Patricia Ann Whitis McGarity, is still very much alive and healthy. The ending e on Anne is because, well, I am a huge fan of Anne of Green Gables (which one of my grandmothers introduced to me, actually) and I agree, the e makes the name look so much prettier. :)

So that is that. I hope I go into labor soon. I am really bored and miserable. Bored because what I can do is limited by the exhaustion/discomfort, and the fact that Ben is gone all the time for his current rotation during this residency (trauma), and miserable...for the same reasons. *Sigh* Dare I hope that I get even luckier and that Ally will beat her brothers who were already both 2 weeks early? Oh well, if not, anyone can get through 2 weeks, right?

Preschool Playgroup

2011-09-21T14:50:00.000-07:00

Since Jackson's birthday is August 31st, he is eligible to start Kindergarten next school year, but Ben and I decided to hold him back a year so that he'll be the oldest instead of the youngest. As far as social skills and education go, he is ready now, I think. His attention span could use some work though, and a few other minor issues, but the main reason we chose to wait to enroll him is for future confidence. I was the youngest in my class, too, and always struggled with confidence for unknown reasons. I was smart and a cute enough kid, I guess, but for some reason, I never felt like I could be myself. Ben's reason related to confidence is sports, of course.

Anyway, I have been trying to work with him myself, and have started to teach him to read. He is doing very well, and is already blending sounds. If I could get into a routine with it, I think he'd do much better, but these days, I am so tired, I am rarely motivated to let him stay up the extra 30 minutes after his brother has gone down for nap so that I can work with him. Horrible, I know.

I had wanted to put him in a Mother's Day Out program for a few days a week to keep him in a school routine of some kind, to get him out of the house for a little bit to interact with other kids, and to be taught by other people besides me, but Ben wouldn't let me pay for him to go anywhere, saying that it's silly to pay someone to teach preschool kids to our children when I am a preschool teacher! lol, I guess he has a point there. However, I was determined that it would be best thing for him, and for his brother, Sam, now almost 2.5. Sam's personality is so strong that I thought if I could channel it in a positive direction, it would really help the harmony of our home, but I needed some one-on-one time with him. Enter preschool playgroup. Two other ladies from my ward at church have little boys about he same age as Jackson, and we have started a preschool group on Tuesdays and Thursdays for 2 hours that rotates between our houses. Each of us teach 5 weeks before Christmas Break.

I am loving it so far! Jackson loves to go to "school" and play with new kids and learn, and he is getting to do a lot of things that I could never do in MY preschool since I had so many kids. For instance, last week, they learned about Community Helpers and got to tour the fire station and police station! jackson came home telling me all about it!

Plus, the benefits to Sam are working out just as I had hoped. I am really starting to see a change in his behavior. He is throwing less fits and is generally more cooperative and helpful and fun to be around. He is even becoming a better dinner eater! I'd say he only goes to bed hungry once or twice a week now! (I am referring to this post if you don't know what I am talking about. http://pcolleen21.blogspot.com/2011/07/sam-doesnt-eat.html) He now randomly comes up to me and says, "Mama, I wanna love you." or "I wanna snuggle with you." Once, last week, we built a tent in his room and played in it just the 2 of us until it was time to go get Jackson from school. I know that when Ally gets here, it will be a big adjustment for Sam once again (and for all of us), but I am hoping that training him to be sweet and helpful now will pay off when Ally is here. I don't doubt we will have a bit of regression though. Another benefit is that we have scheduled 3 of my 5 weeks to come BEFORE Ally gets here, so that while I am recovering, Jackson can go to preschool twice a week and I won't have to teach for a while.

All in all, Jackson's preschool playgroup has been beneficial to us all! I am grateful to have found this group of ladies and their boys to co-op with! It was certainly an answer to several of the issues I have put to prayer lately. :)

Jackson's 4th Birthday

2011-09-20T14:14:00.000-07:00

You would think now that I am staying home WITHOUT a gazillion kiddos running around my home, that I'd be better about keeping up with my blog. The truth is that we have been doing so much lately, that every time I sit down and think about blogging, I get overwhelmed with everything I should post, and don't. I guess the most major event that has passed is Jackson's birthday.
I was about 33 weeks pregnant when Jackon's birthday hit. After the Mario birthday party I threw for him in Tulsa last year (that he talked about and asked me to tell him "the story" about at bedtime for months afterwards), I had decided that this year we were going to keep it low key to make it less work for me. I looked into bounce house places and swimming pools, but everything was so expensive and I just couldn't justify the cost for only a few hours. He had requested a superhero birthday party, and I was all set to throw him a standard pre-packaged superhero birthday party, but this is me we are talking about and I just couldn't wrap my mind around something so unoriginal, especially if it is COSTLY and unoriginal.

So...I researched some homemade superhero party games and decided that the theme of the birthday party would be Superhero Training Camp. The kids would complete a series of heroic tasks and then get to decorate a superhero cape and masks as they celebrated becoming "real" superheroes. I invited most of his friends from preschool, sewed simple superhero capes, cut out felt shapes and letters for each child's name, and bought some superhero masks. Here are some pictures to document how much fun we had.

This is the villian pinata I made. It started out as a cheap baseball pinata from Hobby Lobby, but I painted it. The kids took turns beating up the bad guy with boxing gloves and then a bat.

This is SuperHero Jackson. I made some felt masks with each child's name on them and we played pin the mask on the superhero.

This bad guy served as target practice with the dart gun. The kids had to shoot him to prevent him from stealing the money from the bank.

Here is the one concession to the standard superheroes that I made. The cupcake tower was all decorated with Batman and Spiderman stickers and decor and I tried my hand for the first time with gum paste cupcake toppers. I just made standard store bought cake mix and made cupcakes and frosted them with store bought frosting, then made the toppers and stuck them to the top. Easy Peasy!

Here is a cute shot of little brother Sam, age 27 months, hitting the villian pinata with the boxing gloves at the party.

And well, it was the beginning of September in Texas, so it was hot. We had to have a water balloon fight to end the party! My camera was dying so I just clicked away, and you can't really tell what the kids were doing.

Here is a shot of the capes I made for the youngest partiers, the 2 year olds, Samson and Alex (Bradley Andersen's little sister). I made their capes beforehand since I thought they'd need a lot of help to make them and that way I could use them as examples for the bigger kids to follow when designing their own capes.

The new superhero squad...

...showing off their successful completion of training camp! :)

(One game was not pictured - as I mentioned, my camera was dying - the kids had to rescue a "victim" from the top of a skyscraper. I had spray painted a box black and cut out yellow rectangles for windows and put a baby doll on top. The kids had to walk ONLY on the yarn spiderweb path to get to the skyscraper.)

Wasting My Potential

2011-08-10T21:13:00.000-07:00

In 1984, I was the first and only female kindergartener in my elementary school to be identified and accepted into the brand-new gifted program.

In 4th grade, I wrote a poem for my teacher, which he loved so much, he had it professionally illustrated and mounted and framed. Last I checked, he still displayed it on his wall above his desk.

In middle school, several poems I wrote were published in Young Authors anthologies.

In my senior year in a high school of over 2,000 students (juniors and seniors), I was the assitant editor and feature editor of the Broken Arrow High School newspaper and won multiple state writing awards for my newspaper articles.

I also played Varsity Soccer, was on the Oklahoma State Olympic Development Soccer Team for a period, and played on a competitive team as well. I won a college scholarship to the University of Arkansas at Little Rock, a Division I college to play soccer and study Journalism.

Since college, I have earned an Insurance Agent's License and a Bachelor's Degree in Elementary Education, become licensed to teach in 2 states, taught preschool, 3rd and 4th grade, became English as a Second Language Certified, and ran a successful business out of my home.

Now I am the stereotypical barefoot-and-pregnant stay-at-home mom. And you know what? I love it.

There are some who would make denigrating comments toward me (and have to my face and behind my back), insinuating that I "wasted my potential" and that I am subservient to my husband. These people don't know me very well, do they?

Anyone who knows me would laugh at the absurd idea that I am subservient to Ben. He would probably tell you that if you would let him in on the secret to get me to be so, he'd gladly pay good money for it.

And as for wasting my potential...well, I suppose we all choose which "potential" we want to develop, don't we? Sure, maybe I could have been a cuthroat reporter or a famous author. Maybe I could have used my brilliant mind for some high-paying career. Maybe that makes some people happy. Good. It wasn't what I wanted. I chose my life, and I choose it every day. I count myself blessed to be able to stay home with my children, who I love and enjoy (if you can't tell by my multiple facebook posts about them every day). They make me laugh, and I find no greater fulfillment than seeing the results of something I have taught them. I am grateful that before I send them out into the world of public school, I can be confident in knowing that the foundation of their selves and all their values came from me, and not some other caregiver who may or may not share my ideologies. I can know that they were taught more than preschool skills. They were taught manners, discipline, hard work, perseverance, compassion for others, how to resolve their own problems and be independent, how to control their temper, how to talk to other people in different social settings, that they don't always get EVERYTHING they want and that's okay, how to eat nutritiously, and the difference between right and wrong. To me, that IS my potential. That is the potential that GOD saw in me when he made me a mother. It is my greatest responsibility on this earth. What good is all the money from my high-paying career if I go to heaven and can't look the Lord in the eye and tell Him I did my best to teach more of His children how to return to Him! What good is all the status I can acheive in this life if my children grow up to be failures and can't carry on the legacy I create?

And on a side note, if it is financially feasible for me to stay home, why would I CHOOSE to add stress to all the lives of my family members, but mostly me, by trying to balance the responsibilities of managing a home, plus the role of a career woman, mother, and wife? By staying home, I not only GET to be with my children every day, but I can remove stress from my husband by supporting him in his career, manage the duties of home, AND still have time to pursue my talents and interests. Who says that by doing this I AM wasting any kind of potential? I got my degree. If anything happened to my husband, I could support my family if need be. And just because right now I am not focused on a career, doesn't mean that I never can be. Maybe when my children are grown, I'll go back to school, earn a Master's, maybe even a Doctorate, and go teach in the education department of a university. Or maybe, just maybe, while I am at home relaxed, and in my creative element, I'll write that children's book I have had an idea for at the back of my mind.

Sam Doesn't Eat!!

2011-07-25T07:33:00.000-07:00

Almost every night, Sam refuses to eat dinner. Doesn't usually matter what we are eating, he is just not a dinner eater. At all.

We typically eat dinner between 5:30-6 pm. Sam typically goes to bed between 7:30-8. If he doesn't eat, our rule is that he gets no treats and nothing to eat or drink except water before bedtime.

Then every morning Sam demands that we all wake up as soon as he wakes up (usually between 6:30-7) and go downstairs and "eat some brep-pest." Some days I feel a little guilty letting the boys watch a show so I can sleep in a bit because Sam is always demanding food and I know he hasn't eaten since he woke up from naptime the previous day and had a snack. (and trust me, I have eliminated the snack and extra drinks in the afternoon and still...he doesn't eat dinner.) So we come downstairs and I make the boys scrambled eggs and cinnamon raisin toast or Kashi waffles with strawberries...etc. A good breakfast. But every morning after making me feel like a horrible mom for not getting up as soon as he does and making him breakfast immediately, he eats only a few bites of breakfast, puts his plate in the sink and declares himself done and cannot be coaxed back to eat another bite. I could accept that maybe he just isn't going through a growth spurt right now and so doesn't need much food, except that a half hour later he is begging me for juice or a "spe-shal treat" or some kind of junk other than what I served for breakfast.

I hold strong. I don't give him what he wants, except to offer him water (which he HATES).  He throws a major temper tantrum and goes to his room. Yesterday he came right out of his room, and disregarding my warning, asked me for apple juice AGAIN when we reached the bottom of the stairs. Of course, I made him give me the scripted "What does no mean?" answer.

(When the boys ask us repeatedly for things after we say no, we make them give us the scripted answer. It goes like this, "What does no mean?" "No, and stop asking." It was adapted from the scripted answer my grandmother used to make us say when we'd visit her for 2 weeks over the summer and became exasperated with us. Back then, no meant, "No, and SHUT UP ABOUT IT!!" lol)

Anyway, you know what happened next. He threw a screaming fit, and back to his room he went.

I am so frustrated to start my day this way every day! Most days I have been awake for less than 45 minutes when I have to deal with this kids temper tantrums, and if it isn't daily, it is at least 5 days a week. And I am NOT a morning person, so this has been trying my patience.

I will say that by the time lunch rolls around, he usually scarfs it down, then has a drink and a small snack after nap, like I mentioned earlier, but that is it. A few bites of brakfast and a drink. Nothing till lunch time. A big lunch and a treat for eating it all gone. A snack and drink after lunch.  And then? Nada. Unless they go outside to play, in which case, they get a small glass of water or juice, because...well, it's Texas and it is HOT!!!

He is a picky eater, but it has come a long way. He does much better now about eating more of a variety of fruits, veggies and meats which he mostly used to refuse no matter the mealtime.  I used to have to be tricky about getting him to eat things. But now he either eats it willingly or finds it hidden, and picks it out if he deosn't want it. I have seen him refuse things for breakfast and dinner that I KNOW he loves! He just doesn't want to sit down and eat dinner and doesn't eat much breakfast. Okay, and also, despite all this, my child is not in any danger of poor health and nutrition. He is about average when it comes to both height and weight and doesn't have any digestive problems or bowel movement issues.

Anyone have any supermom suggestions about things I could try to help him eat appropriately?

Fun with New Friends on the Fourth

2011-07-20T17:17:00.000-07:00

Going home and watching the fireworks show in Tulsa with his family for the 4th of July is Ben's favorite holiday tradition, but this year he had to work the next day, so we opted to stay here and go see a local show with our little family. We chose to go to the Trinity River show which is just ten minutes down the road from our house here in Fort Worth. We got there at 4:30. It was roasting hot. The show wasn't scheduled to start until 9pm. There were all kinds of fun things to do along the river: water bounce houses, a live band, lots of food vendors, including complementary water and watermelon, cardboard mat sliding down the hill, and the Fort Worth Cats baseball game in the stadium right behind us. Plus, there were people floatingthe river and all sorts of other river activities. With me being 6 mos pregnant, and as hot as it was, I mostly held down our blanket while Ben carted the boys off to fun activities alone. I felt bad, btu I actually got a little nauseous after hauling so much stuff such a long distance in the Texas July heat. Sometimes I just overdo it. Anyway, we happened to notice some new friends walking by!

This is Kajal. She is recently married to Veer, one of Ben's new resident buddies. Jackson was instantly enamored with her and was sitting in her lap or doing something to try to impress her all night. She is a saint, and didn't seem to mind! :)

Here is Sam, cheerfully enduring the heat.

Jackson and Daddy, resting and rehydrating after a trip to the bounce house.

Here are Veer and Kajal. Notice that you don't see Jackson in this picture, but don't worry, Sam was stepping up to fill his absense.

My multi-talented Jackson. It is a wonder Kajal didn't drop at his feet, in desperate love! ;)

The large pregnant woman holding the blanket down.

I managed to coax him into my lap long enough to take a picture.

Veer is comforting Sam. Sam was throwing a fit. Who knows why. Sometimes I don't think he needs a reason. :)

We had a lot of fun with Veer and Kajal, and more resident buddies joined us as it started to get dark. I am so grateful that Ben works with some really wonderful and fun people. We've had a few over to our house since then to play games and there were a lot of laughs.

Ally's nursery...so far

2011-07-20T15:52:00.000-07:00

For some reason, it won't let me put these pics in the order I want to, so sorry if you have to scroll around some.

Here is the bedding I decided to go with so I didn't have to repaint all the nursery furniture. After it got here, I painted the walls a VERY light green, which you can kind of see from this picture.

Remember the brown cubbies that were behind my front door when I ran the preschool? I painted them black, distressed them, and found these super-cute pink fabric bins at Target. Gonna get a few more of these to fill most of the cubbies, but I thikn I'll leave some empty. Thoughts?

This is a close up of the quilt and crib skirt so you can see the cute detail I tried to copy on the dresser.

And the dresser after I hand painted (and scrapbook papered) a similar design on it.

The dresser BEFORE...as it was in Sam's pirate room.

Close up of the detail work before I glued on the ladybugs.

Total cost of all paint and bedding: abt $200.00, but I am betting having Ally in it...is priceless.

(10 weeks left.)

Independence

2011-06-28T09:28:00.000-07:00

Now that I am staying home with the boys without other children in the house, I have decided that it is time to teach them to do more things on their own, especially wth a new baby coming! So far they have been completely on board, as both of them frequently use the words, "by myself." As in, "I wanna turn the light off by myself!" "I want to put my pants on by myself." "I want to climb up this ladder by myself!"
Here are a few things we have implemented to promote independence and help our day go smoothly:

1. Jackson now lets Lady out in the morning when we all go downstairs together and lets her back in. He also gets a scoop of food for her, dumps it in her tray and then takes her tray to the bathroom sink and fills up the other side with water. He is very proud of himself for taking care of our dog "all by himself" and sometimes wants to feed her and let her out more than need be. :)

2. Sam changes his own wet diapers. We are on the brink of potty training, I think. I have not been wanting to start since it was such an ordeal with Jackson, but Sam insists that he "need-a go potty" all the time, so I bought him some pull-ups to encourage him to practice pulling his pants up and down "by himself," and he does. He announces he needs to go potty, goes in, pulls the step stool up to the toilet, pulls his pants and pull-up down, steps up there and earnestly tries to go multiple times a day (without success so far). Then puts his own pull-up and pants back on (with occasional help from mom). When he is wet, he takes his old diaper and puts it in the diaper trash and gets a new one out of the diaper drawer. When he is poopy, he is usually very grossed out and comes to tell me immediately, but just in case, I check him before he takes off his diaper every time. He always announces it before he does this, so I have to chance to check him first.

3. Jackson can get his own juice. (There is a limit to how many glasses of juice he can have.) I bought a large container with a spout and put it on a low shelf in the fridge. I keep it filled with half juice/half water mixture (and sometimes just water) and put cups for Jackson and Sam next to it in the fridge. When he wants a drink (or his brother does), he serves it "all by himself." Occasionally he does spill it a little when he gets eager to pull the cup out from under the spout, but I just put a paper towel on the bottom of the fridge and change it out ever so often. A slightly sticky fridge is worth it so see how happy he is to be a big boy and get his own drink when he is thirsty. The side issues this also helps with is a) drinking out of a big boy cup instead of a sippy cup, b) keeping drinks in the kitchen only (which in turn helps me not to have to clean up disgusting forgotten sippy cups from all around the house).

4. Both the boys undress themselves for bath, and while I am dressing Sam after removing him from the tub, Jackson gets his own towel, dries off and gets himself redressed in bedtime attire I set out while runing the bath. This has dropped 5 minutes off our bedtime routine. Love it! (I don't know why I didn't do this one sooner, but I guess I just got into the habit of dressing them both myself.)

5. Both boys brush their own teeth. I put the toothpaste on (non-flouride still) and turn on the toothbrushes, then I take a short "turn" after they are done.

6. Jackson gets his own clothes out of the drawer and clothes for Sam in the morning. He dresses himself and sets Sam's clothes out for me. We are working on teaching Sam to dress himself too, but this is where we are at right now. To make it easier for Jackson to do this, I have showed him which drawer his summer clothes are in, and when I put them in the drawer, I put them together in outfits that match so he doesn't end up dressed crazy. Eventually, I will teach him how to find clothes in his drawer that match, but he's only almost 4 right now, so that lesson will have to wait until he is older.

7. Of course, both of the boys are in charge of keeping their own rooms and the playroom clean. They have to put their toys away at the end of the day, but we have been cleaning up our own messes as part of our preschool day for so long, that they really don't question it. In fact, Jackson was up later than usual last night, and I was rushing through the bedtime routine and he noticed that he had left a bucket of Tinkertoys out on the floor of the playroom, and before I could read him his bedtime story, he insisted that he needed to clean up his mess. Jackson also hates when there are toys on the floor of his room at bedtime. I think they leave scary shadows that he is not used to, so before he will go to bed, he will pick them up himself and put them where they go so that everything casts normal shadows while he is trying to sleep. :)

8. Do you have two story house? Do you find that you are constantly picking things up that need to go upstairs and storing them on the stairs for members of your family to put away? And how often does that happen? ;) In my house, our stairs were always a mess, and I was the only one who would take things up and put them away. So I instituted a basket system. There is a basket for me, Ben, and the boys, and every night when we go up for the night, we have to take our own basket up and put the items where they go. Right now we are doing some home improvements to our living room and dining room area. Ben is going to replace our carpet with stained concrete floors and put in a mudroom area by our front door. Our stairs are directly in front of the front door, so when the mudroom is complete, the baskets will be stored on a shelf instead of on the stairs.

Well, that is all I've got so far. If you have any ideas, I welcome them. I think one of my newest projects will include an incentive chart for good behavior and chores, but I am still figuring out how I want to do that.

Mother's Day weekend

2011-06-22T11:28:00.000-07:00

Me: 16.5 weeks, Mom's Cousin Nancy, and my Aunt Sara

I know this is belated, but for Mother's day weekend a whole group of female members of my family booked a scrapbook retreat in McKinney, TX. We had a blast. The original purpose was to spend as much bonding time as possible with my mom. She has been fighting Stage 4 breats cancer for some time now, and although she is now cancer free again, just a few months ago she had so many tumors in the truck of her body that she had a nasty cough and was really limping around. The chemo takes such a toll on her. Thank goodness she is now done with that non-productive clinical trial and is back in the hands of her miraculously capable doctor. Anyway, here are a few pictures to commemorate how much fun we had!!

The 3 generational group of beautiful ladies all stemming from the Whitis family. :)

And my mother, Mollie Conroy, hard at work, scrapbooking in the crop room.

13 weeks, 2 days, first doctor visit

2011-04-13T10:49:00.000-07:00

Monday was my first doctor's visit with baby #3. I applied for pregnancy Medicaid (a joy of living off student loans - primarily) and was accepted, received all my welcome pamphlets and paperwork and was assigned a primary care physician and an OB, but I still had not received my card. I waited and waited and waited and still...no card. I had been waiting to schedule my appt because I can't afford to pay the office visit by myself and I needed my proof of insurance for the doctor to bill it to Medicaid. Finally I couldn't wait any longer. I had been having nightmares of miscarriages and twins and all sorts of crazy things. I needed to hear that heartbeat just to confirm that everything was okay. I went ahead and scheduled my appt hoping I'd get my card in time, and if not, well, I'd just eat it and hope Medicaid would reimburse me. It seems like when I had Jackson my office visits ran around $60-70 each. Nope. $165 for the office visit. OUCH. First visits at my clinic are always with a nurse practitioner and since I was so far along, there was lots to do. I had to have my girly exam first because I hadn't had one since after I had Sam. (I hadn't had insurance.) Then she checked for a heartbeat. After a few scary minutes she found baby, very low, almost behind my pelvic bone. That sound just made me melt. I couldn't help but break into a cheesy smile, and I almost cried. I hadn't realized how anxious I had let myself get. That is so silly because I had been feeling great and Ben had been keeping an eye on me, too, and I should have known everything would be alright. I guess that one miscarriage I had before Jackson always gives me a little panic attack. After a long visit with the nurse practitioner, she sent me to get bloodwork. This clinic does their own lab work, so I just walked down the hall. As I entered the lab and sat down in the designated blood drawing seat, the lab tech asked me, "How would you like to pay?" gulp. huh? "I thought I already did pay, up front." "No," she said, with a grimace, "this is separate. It'll be $240.00" Oh Crap. So what did I do? Shelled out my cc, got the blood drawn, and began my drive home, dreading how I was going to tell Ben what I had just done. Needless to say, he was.not.thrilled. Today's naptime agenda has me calling Medicaid to find out why they are showing that I am not active until May!? And pleading for them to backdate my active status so that somehow I can be reimbursed for the $400.00 I shelled out. I'm trying to look at the bright side: no more nightmares, and I have a confirmation that baby is fine, and so am I.

12 weeks, 2 days

2011-04-06T11:00:00.000-07:00

11 weeks, 2 days (This picture was last week.)

I haven't been to the doctor yet. My first appt is on Monday. Those first few appts are uneventful anyway, and I HAVE an OB/GYN trained doctor in my household if I need one, although I am a little anxious to hear the heartbeat and just confirm that everything is fine.

So far I have just been really, really tired. I had some very bad nausea at the beginning, but I started taking my prenatals at night and problem solved. Right now my biggest concern is that I have gained TEN LBS since finding out I was pregnant 7 weeks ago. I always tend to gain more than I should in the beginning, but that still seems like a lot to me. I started exercising at home on my new elliptical at least three times a week for 30 minutes (I normally quit working out during pregnancy because I am just too tired and can't get motivated since I don't see results.), and that seems to have slowed down the weight gain, but it is still rising at a rapid rate.

Maybe I'm just paranoid because I'm overly concerned about gaining after having JUST lost all the weight from Sam? It seems like my belly is measuring a lot bigger than it should at this point tho. I started wearing maternity jeans this week. You could practically hear my jeans squealing in protest every time I squeexed myslef into them. It was becoming painful and I am just not a fan of the open top button/belly band thing. It feels slobbish to me. So it is either stretchy pants or maternity clothes.

Today I took the boys to a doctor appt. As I passed the doctor on the way to the second waiting area, he commented to my husband that he noticed I was pregnant again. Really? He can tell just in passing that I am big enough to be pregnant. Cuz people don't usually say anything unless they are pretty confident. Now I am a little more anxious to get the doctor to make sure I am not measuring too big for this age and if Iam, WHY? No twins, no twins, no twins...how could that even happen anyway? We have no twins in either of our families - the chances are slim to none. But it HAS been on my mind, on others' lips and in my dreams a lot lately. Sigh - well, come what may and love it, right? And I would, of course. Silver lining of twins? I'd get BOTH the names I like (well, if boy/girl). ;)

Samson Jay, 22 months

2011-04-05T17:59:00.000-07:00

Samson trying his first Hot Tamale candy. The spiciness didn't even phase him. It was CANDY!

One of my favorite things to do is go back and read my blog to remind me what things my kids said and did at certain ages. It especially helped me to look back at Jackson posts when Sam was about that age so I could see what things I needed to work on with Sam. Sometimes I feel like poor Sam gets a little neglected. Jackson got a year of undivided attention from me before I started the preschool, and Sam never got that. I started working again when school started when he was three months old. Even breastfeeding shortly went by the wayside once other kids came into play. I can't tell you how excited I am to shortly have an abudance of time to just BE with my own kiddos! Sometimes after a long day with everyone else's kids, I have very little left for my own kids. I prepare a healthy dinner, bathe them and get them in bed at a proper time, but that is about all I can handle! This makes me sad because they are the reason I started an in-home preschool -so I could be with them and take care of them and teach them myself, but I have just spread myself too thin this last year and I know my family has suffered for it. Ben, too. Anyway, major source of guilt for me, but let's not dwell on that, shall we? ;) So...this post is to document some of the funny phrases and things Sam does so that when Ally (I am convinced baby Blake #3 is a girl) hits this age, I can compare. Funny Things He Says

"Ah yoo okay?" (Are you okay?)

"Mmmm...like it!" (when trying something yummy)

"Wuv yoo!" (randomly, but a lot of times when he WANTS something, like to sit with me)

"Mama, I unna te-yoo sumting!" (and then random babbling afterwards, this is repeated as many times as he chooses or until I go crazy, lol).

"Mama, whattawe havin' today?" (at snacktime, dinnertime, etc.)

"I no-no" (complete with a cute shoulder shrug -If you ask him where somthing is, i.e. his sippy cup)

"___ is hutting me!" (diaper rash, a scrape,a smashed finger...)

"I ate AWMYDINNA!" (which may or may not be true, and may or not be dinner, but he likes to get excited about it either way.)

Funny Things He Does

LOVES to get in his big boy bed!

makes a scowly MAD face upon demand

sings the ABC's pretty well - at least the letters kinda sound like what they should be, lol

counts to ten

LOVES to sing ABCs, the Popcorn Primary Song, Skidamarinkydink, and the Sunbeam song

LOVES bubbles ("buggols") in the bathtub

LOVES to play guns (grrr...) and falls down himself whenever HE shoots someone (not quite grasping the concept, but I'm ok with that)

LOVES movies and will sit quietly for sometimes 30 minutes to watch (a nice treat while I'm cooking dinner)

LOVES to swing in a big boy swing as long as someone pushes him. And he will swing high, too. He is fearless!

He has very good fine motor skills for his age. He handles utensils and pens/crayons very well. Much better than Jackson at this age.

Not-So-Very-Fun Things He Does Sam is SO stubborn and persistent! He thinks he is just as big as Jackson and the other kids. Therefore, he wants to do everything they do, and sometimes that is dangerous for a little guy! Case-in-point: Last Saturday, Katy and I both brought our two kids to Garden Ridge to do a little shopping. Jackson and Bradley were REALLY good. They started out in my cart, while Katy pushed the babies in a double stroller. Soon, we needed the room in the cart, so we asked them to walk. As soon as Sam saw that the big kids got to get out, he wanted out, too. He proceeded to throw a level 10 screaming temper tantrum. I tried everything! I put him in time out right on the floor of the store, I swatted him twice...nada. Finally, I made room for him in the seat of my cart, and I had to pin his shoulders to the cart for 40 minutes, and the ENTIRE time we shopped he writhed around and screamed bloody muder. Finally, he decided to knock it off and he was fairly cheerful, but wore himself out and was asleep within minutes after we got back in the car. During the fit, a lady even stopped me and told me that if I put him on my shoulder, he'd probably fall right to sleep. I laughed and said, "Uh - no he won't. You don't know him." This whole incident was well before his normal naptime. Sidenote: Child expert yentas really annoy me. Why do people assume all children are the same and that they know what triggered your child to get upset!? This incident is just par for the course with Sam. His strong, independent personality can be a good and a bad thing. I just don't know where he gets it from! ;) (Actually, I think he got a dose from both sides, lol.) Also, Sam is a VERY picky eater. Most meats, fruits and veggies are a no-go with him. He will ocassionally eat grapes and he loves green beans and sometimes corn, but that is it. He will nibble at fish and chicken,but no beef. Hot dogs have just recenlty become do-able. Any type of bread is like candy to Sam, and he loves to drink anything but water. He asks me for a drink all day long. He'll drink 2 full sippy cups in minutes and ask for more, but give him water and it is temper tantrum city. How do I handle this? I refuse to give in and I refuse to make him his own special meal. I keep preparing healthy foods and putting them in front of him. When he doesn't eat them, he gets nothing else and he goes to bed hungry. When he does eat them, I go over-the-top on excitement in my voice and give him a treat for dessert. He loves fruit rolls-ups or fruit snacks, cookies, or candy, of course, but I only give them in small doses and only for a reward.

Match Day and Pregnancy #3!

2011-03-25T12:56:00.000-07:00

I know I haven't blogged in so long, but really I have been so busy/worn out with so much to post about that every time I thought about sitting down to blog, it seemed like such a daunting task that I talked myself right out of it. We'll see how it goes today...

Firstly, I must tell those of you who may have heard a rumor going around that yes, it is true. I am pregnant with my third child. I am almost 11 weeks pregnant now (due in October), and so almost out of the sicky/exhausted/blah phase, YAY! We really don't mind if we end up with a boy or girl this time. After all, if it is a boy, we are set with boy stuff. If it is a girl, YAY! One of each!

With both Jackson and Samson we battled to the bitter end to agree on a name we both liked, but we have already decided that if it is a boy, he will be Anderson (Andy) and if it is a girl, she will be Allyson (Ally). Middle names are not completely decided on, but right now, it looks like James (my dad) and Anne (both my grandmas). We are VERY excited to welcome our new addition! One of us is VERY MUCH NOT excited to get fat all over again and have to bust it to get it all back off, but...as I tell Jackson when he has to do something he doesn't want to "This is just what we do," and I am willing to do it. By the time Baby #3 is here, Jackson will be 4 and Sam will be 2.5.

We moved Samson into Jackson's room last weekend. We broke down Jackson's bunk beds and made them into twin beds. Sam is very excited to be sleeping in a "big boy" bed and in the same room with his brother. Jackson is equally excited to have a companion. Sometimes they are a little TOO excited, and no one gets ANY sleep. :) Since Jackson was starting to not nap during the day, we extended his bedtime to 8:30-9, and we put Sam to bed alone at 8:00. This seems to work for bedtime, but naptime has been another story. On the weekends we do the same thing - put Sam down first since he usually falls asleep quickly, but during the weekdays when I have my preschoolers, this is a little tricky. I'm still working on a solution. I don't want to confuse Sam by putting him in his crib sometimes and big boy bed other times. And some days Jackson just plays around in his room and wakes Sam up.

The biggest news for us lately is that we found out that Ben matched to a residency program at his second pick. This is wonderful because a lot of times people match waaaay further down their preference list. For us, this is especially awesome because our second pick was to stay here in Fort Worth so we could stay in our house and that is what we got! Ben signed a contract with John Peter Smith, the Tarrant county hospital in the Emergency Medicine Program. He works 8 hour shifts, gets a great salary, and full dental, vision and health insurance paid for the whole family! Plus we have saved a bundle by not having to sell our house in this economy. I am excited because our house has PLENTY of room for us to grow into, and I was worried that if we sold our house, we wouldn't find a house with even half as much space for what we pay now. Ben finished his last day of rotations today (!!), so now he is done with all school work until he starts his residency in JULY! He has 14 weeks off to do whatever he chooses! He is so excited because how often has he had ANY time off in like the last 7 years that we have been married!? (Not often.) He graduates in May, and he will be Dr. Benjamin Blake, D.O.!! I can't tell you how proud I am of him, and how excited I am for our family!! In three short years, he will be finished with residency and we will be free!!! Free of school, free of being broke (except those pesky student loan payments), free to live wherever we want to, free to go on vacations, FREEEEEE!!!!!

When we moved to Texas when we first got married, I taught 3rd grade and Ben was finishing his undergrad at UNT in Denton. I knew we'd be here for those 3 years, but I never expected that we'd only be moving 30 minutes South to Fort Worth for another 4 years for med school and then get to stay again for another 3 years for residency. This is unheard of for med school/residency! We will have been in basically the same area of Texas for ten years! I love it! I love Texas. I was born here, and I'd be perfectly fine if we never moved out of Texas! (Of course, Ben does NOT agree...)

On March 5, Ben and I celebrated our 7 year anniversary. Wow, it has been a wild ride and so much has changed about our family and our realtionship. But I can honestly say, there is no other man I'd rather be attached to in this life and for eternity. We are so blessed!

Where Does Heavenly Father Live?

2011-01-28T18:07:00.000-08:00

Bowling after Christmas, 2010, with Ben's family. Jackson and I were playing around with the camera.

I have been trying to have more and more conversations about the Lord with Jackson (now 3.5) lately. We pray before every meal and at night we say prayers together kneeling in front of his bed, but I want him to develop a personal relationship with his Heavenly Father, and I don't think he quite "gets" who we are praying to or why. He just knows we do. It's part of our routine.

I have mentioned to him when we are in church that we don't run down the halls and we need to use quiet voices in the Lord's house. Also, at the beginning of January, he started Primary, and I have been trying to read the Sunbeams lessons ahead of time (or afterwards) and talk to him about what he discusses in Primary, so it will sink in or we can make a personal connection to it at home. Tonight after we said prayer, he asked me to tell him a story, which I did (about his Mario birthday party since that is what he pretty much requests every night). And somehow our conversation turned to him being sorry about something he did. I said, "Well, I know you feel bad, and you said you were sorry. I forgive you. Everybody makes mistakes. Even Mamas and Daddies make bad choices sometimes. Did you know that?" He looked at me kinda funny, but I continued, "But when you make a bad choice you just have to ask Heavenly Father to forgive you. You have to say you are sorry, and ask him to forgive you and try harder next time not to make the same bad choice. He will still love you and he will forgive you, just like I love you and I will forgive you, too."

I don't know if that really sunk in because then he mumbled something about where Heavenly Father lives. So I said, "Where DOES Heavenly Father live? Do you know?" And he sat, pondering for a minute, and then, as if it was a "DUH!" kind of answer, he said, "He lives IN HIS HOUSE!" I said, "Well, yes, that's right, but where is His house?" And Jackson said, "AT CHURCH!" I laughed and said, "Yes, that's right, and He lives in temples, too. Heavenly Father is special because he can be lots of places at the same time. He can be at church, and he can be in the temple, and did you know that he can be in your heart, too?" At this point, Jackson was looking at me, dumbfounded. He is very obsessed with hearts right now because for some reason he is into doctors and how they listen to your hearts with stethoscopes to make sure your heart is healthy (and also give you shots). So I said, "You know Heavenly Father is in your heart because He makes you heart feel happy and safe. You can feel how much He loves you when your heart feels happy."

At that, he just quietly laid down, with a thoughtful expression, and was ready to go to bed. I don't know how much sunk in, but I am so glad the opportunity arose to have that impromptu conversation about the Lord. I am so blessed to be both Jackson and Samson's mother. They bring such joy to my life every day.

Jackson, age 3

2010-11-04T19:03:00.000-07:00

I am just so proud of Jackson. He never ceases to amaze me. He is so sweet and sensitive. He hates to disappoint me.

Not long ago, we were at the grocery store and he purposefully kicked the chips after I specifically asked him to be careful not to kick them. I told him he lost the privilege of sitting in the cart. He threw a fit which escalated to a full on temper tantrum right in the store, and I even had to spank him when we were checking out, right in front of everyone. On the way home, I told him he was not allowed to talk to me because I was not happy about his choices at the store, and when we got home he spent some time in his room. When he came down, he said, of his own accord, "Mom, I'm sorry I was not a good boy at the store. I want to be a good boy now." For the rest of the night, he was. Three days later, while we were eating lunch, he randomly asked me, "Mom, are you happy with me about the store?" I said, "Jackson, I am not happy you made bad choices at the store, but you told me you were sorry and you have been a good boy, and I forgive you, so I am happy with you now." But he continues to ask me every now and then if I am happy about that one incident, and I always give the same reply. When I tell him I am not happy with him, it really hurts his feelings and has such an impact on him that a lot of times that is all I'll have to say. Oh, he throws his fits, don't get me wrong, but I usually only have to let him know that he isn't making a good choice and I'm not happy about it, and after a minute to think about it, he gets control of himself, and turns his behavior around. However, he is VERY impressionable, so when he is around other friends who are not making good choices, he often gets caught up in it and gets in trouble. I can see that I will have to work very hard at teaching him that he needs to choose the right always, no matter what everyone else around him is doing.

Academically, he has surpassed everyone in our class in every subject, and he is the youngest 3-year-old of the group. He is even performing at a higher level than my 5-year-old preschooler. He knows all the letters and sounds, knows about vowels and their 2 sounds, can recognize numbers up to 100 and can count that high by 1's, 5's and 10's. He can also tell you all the days of the week, and tell you which day comes after a named day. He knows how to spell his name and can even write some of the letters. He can tell you his birthday, how old he is, and his phone number. I have decided that starting in January, I am going to begin to teach him how to read and practice sight words with him. Already, when we read at night, I'll read a page and say, "Can you find the word duck on the page? Think about the sound you hear at the beginning of the word. What does duck start with? Can you find a word on the page that starts with that same letter?" He gets it right every time.

Today I was doing a worksheet with the kids that I quickly realized was pretty over their heads, but I did it anyway with Jackson, and he got it after a few examples. The thing that shocked me was that the first step on the sheet was counting a set up to 5. I realized he doesn't need to count if the set if a group of 1, 2, 3 or 4. He can look at the group and tell you how many are there. That is a skill that doesn't usually come till after Kindergarten! His fine motor skills need to catch up with his brain, but we are working on that. But he can cut perfectly (striaght lines only) almost with no assistance whatsoever.

I also am constantly touched by his sweet spirit. He loves to say prayers and actually gets sad when it isn't his turn. Today I overheard him and some of his friends pretending to have a Thanksgiving feast in the kitchen center. One friend was serving the food and the feasters were about to eat, and Jackson said, "Wait! Don't eat yet! We have to say a prayer!" He said one very quickly and then opened his eyes, and said, "Okay, NOW you can eat!" Then tonight in our bedtime prayers he thanked the Lord for the rain we recently had and asked Him to please bless Sam so his diaper rash will get better. I was so touched that he thought of his brother's poor sore bottom (he has had diarrhea all day).

Anyway, I was just feeling very overwhelmed with love for this sweet boy the Lord sent to me. I know he isn't perfect, but gosh, he is such a joy to me! I wanted to document how I was feeling and all I have been thinking about today.

Mollie Conroy, inspiration to all...

2010-10-22T17:24:00.000-07:00

In honor of breast cancer awareness month, my sister's salon http://www.lookscompany.com/
is having a spa day with special treats and bonuses for breast cancer patients and survivors. They are featuring my mom, and about 70% of their proceeds for the day are going to go to my mom (who will probably turn around and regift it to Susan G. Komen). My sister's work asked her to write a bio for my mom, but since she knows that words are my talent, she asked me to write it. Here is what I wrote:

Seven years ago, the battle of a beloved local teacher and mother began.
On January 1, 2004, Mollie Conroy was diagnosed with triple-negative breast cancer after finding a lump on her left breast. A prompt lumpectomy was scheduled and doctors removed several lymph nodes as well. Further biopsy of the lymph nodes showed 4 out of 17 to be cancerous.
Mollie, a Broken Arrow South Intermediate High School Law Teacher, Mock Trial coach and mother of 3 children, was determined to be in stage III of breast cancer. Of the four stages of cancer, stage III usually means the cancer is larger, and may have started to spread into surrounding tissues and there are cancer cells in the lymph nodes in the area.
“I had many sleepless nights. I still had a 9-year-old son at home to raise,” said Mollie.
When she recovered from surgery, she quickly started a dose dense treatment of chemotherapy. Amazingly, Mollie, once honored as SIHS’s Teacher of the Year, continued to teach half-days for the remainder of the semester. “By the end of the semester, I was a zombie. By final exams, my sub just took over. I was too sick. I was so grateful for that.”
Mollie underwent chemo followed by radiation through the end of September. During these months, she lost all her hair and struggled with many of the other side effects of cancer treatment, including digestion problems, a compromised immune system, intermittent fevers, extreme fatigue, and joint pain among many other discomforts.
In the Fall of 2004, she attended Susan G. Komen’s Race for the Cure in Tulsa. She related, “It was like a big pep rally. I even felt comfortable enough taking off my cap in public for the first time. It was humbling to see how many people were supportive of what I thought of as my own private battle.”
However, despite her battle, Mollie’s thoughts continued to turn to her family. “I saw a teenage boy with ‘In Memory of My Mother’ on the back of his shirt. I thought, ‘I never want my own son to go through that.” Later that fall, a CAT scan came back all clear. There was no active cancer left in Mollie’s body.
Mollie had a 3 year respite from cancer, but her fight was a long way from over. In the Spring of 2007, she felt some bumps on the left side of her collarbone. Unfortunately, a PET scan showed that the cancer had spread to her left ribs and lymph nodes at the base of her neck. The cancer had metastasized and Mollie was upgraded to a Stage IV. Even through another round of chemo, Mollie continued to teach high school, taking off as needed. Her doctor advised her to retire, but she refused. “I loved my job,” she said.
But at the end of the school year, after doctors removed a benign growth on her fallopian tubes, she realized that she had missed a total of 20 days of school that year. Feeling that her students deserved more, she submitted her retirement paperwork in 2008. She left her students and the Mock Trial team she had started and coached for BAHS for 10 years.
Mollie’s work in education didn’t end with her teaching career, however. In 2007, she volunteered with Families and Communities Empowered for Safety (FACES) and created “Hometown Heroes: Teachers Reporting Suspected Child Abuse or Neglect,” an in-service program making teachers aware of signs and behavior to look for in abuse victims and the responsibilities they have to report suspected abuse. She has also served on the Board of Directors for FACES twice, as well as periodically returned to assist the BAHS Mock Trial team as a volunteer.
In the fall of 2009, a check-up CAT scan revealed that Mollie’s cancer had returned yet again, showing 6 tumors in her lung. For the third time, she started chemo, this time on new drugs, Abraxane and Avastin. By February 2010, the drugs reduced her tumors and were no longer visible on a CAT scan. She stayed on a maintenance dose until the FDA removed Avastin from the market for breast cancer patients.
Once off the treatment, her tumors returned again rapidly. This time Mollie found a Clinical Trial in Dallas, TX for a new treatment, promising great results for triple-negative cancer patients. “I entered what felt like the lottery, and I was chosen,” she said. Mollie is currently driving to Dallas twice a month to receive treatment.
Through all she has been through, Mollie continues to inspire others with her optimism. “I feel very fortunate to be able to get [this new treatment]. One of my friends with the same type of cancer I have didn’t live long enough to participate in this clinical trial. She wanted to do it, but when she applied, they told her she was too far along. She passed away in early 2010,” Mollie confided. “I feel relatively blessed. I have a husband supporting me so I could have the luxury of retiring. So far, I have no long-term side effects of treatment. I never struggled with depression. I became closer to the Lord during this time, and I became bolder saying so. My family has been my number one support team, and I also received support from my church and the kids in my classes. My cancer brought out the best in people.”

Some of God's Greatest Gifts...

2010-10-20T08:02:00.000-07:00

...are unanswered prayers.

Well, really we know that all prayers are answered. We just may not get the answer we were hoping for or an answer in the way we hoped for.

Today I am feeling grateful for "unanswered prayers" in a Garth Brooks kind of way. I am so blessed to live the life I do. I narrowly escaped a very different life. Just happy. Busy, but happy. I wouldn't change a thing.

My Compulsion: Exercise

2010-10-16T20:15:00.000-07:00

It may be a good thing that I am tied to the house for most of the day because if I had more time, I may be a little nutso with the working out. I'm talking like every day for hours on end.

I seriously LOVE working out. I love feeling the burn, pushing myself to the limits of what I can do, having complete control of my body instead of my body controlling or limiting me.

I think it is because I feel strong when I'm lifting weights. I feel like if anyone tried to mess with me, I could take them. I feel fast when I run, like I could outrun any danger.

And I hate, hate, hate the fat that still remains on my body.

When I am working out, I can feel my muscles working and my lungs opening up and my whole body feels alive.

Except the fat.

It sits on my hips and my hangs on to the bottom of my arms and my tummy. It is a foreign mass I can't reach; it is unresponsive when the rest of my body is on overdrive. It makes me angry that I can't control it and make it do what I want it to do. I feel it jiggling when I run, an unwanted hitchiker holding on for dear life. It motivates me to move faster and work harder because I know that is the only way to get it off of me.

See? I told you. CRA-ZY. I have lost a lot of weight, but there is still a ways to go for me to be satisfied. I can't wait until Ben graduates, the boys are in school, I quit working, and I have time during the day to do a few things I want to do. I dream of playing outdoor soccer again, or training to kickbox, or even training to become a personal trainer myself -just something competitive, that pushes me, but Ben's schedule is just too unpredictable right now. Some day, maybe, but for now I have to settle for the few times I can make it to the gym a week, and be grateful for the days when my workout doesn't get interrupted my poopy diapers or a inconsolable child. Does that sound selfish?

And P.S. I wasn't this person (much) before I had babies. What is it about post-babies that turned me into such a workout freak?

Are YOU My Mother?

2010-10-09T16:10:00.001-07:00

We have two versions of this book. One, a board book and shortened version, is Sam's favorite bedtime book. The other, the full hardback version, is Jackson's. I probably have read this book to Jackson 6 out of 7 nights every week for the past 2 months.

When I read it to Sam, I always make the animal sound effects and a mmm-mmm hug sound when the mother bird and baby bird are reunited at the end. Now he makes those sounds for me when we read it together. :)

I do the same for Jackson.

Today I was cleaning upstairs and the boys were running around and playing in the loft. I turned off hte vaccuum to hear, "A mother bird sat on her egg..." I walked into the loft behind Jackson, where I wouldn't distract him, and watched and listened as he recited the entire book to himself with about 80% word for word accuracy, complete with sound effects. This book is probably a 40 page book with 1 to 3 sentences per page. I was shocked, amazed, proud, and entertained. SO of course, I did what any mother would do...

I called my mom and snuck up behind him and had her listen. :)

What a smartie Jack is turning out to be!! He makes me smile with pride and laugh at his zest for life daily. I am blessed to be his mom.

Frosty the Snowman

2010-09-12T07:17:00.001-07:00

My kids LOVE this movie. Love it so much they'd watch it over and over and over and over if I let them. This morning when they woke me up, I was super tired for some reason. I fed them breakfast and asked Jackson which movie he wanted so I could lay down on the couch for a bit, and of course he wanted Frosty. We have watched that movie all year long. I tried to put it away once, but they begged me for it, so I relented.

If you think I am just describing Jackson, you are quite mistaken. When one sesssion of Frosty ends and the movie goes back to the Menu screen, Sam stomps his feet, points to the TV and demands, "TAAAAH-tee!"

Jackson likes to get out his guitar and play-jam to the Frosty theme music. This morning he was doing this and Sam was doing his silly baby dance. I wish I had gotten it on tape. It was super-cute.

Vegetable Pizza

2010-09-10T11:05:00.000-07:00

Some of you may already have this recipe because I got it when we had a RS activity a few years ago in the Saginaw ward and I was asked to make it (along with several other people). It was the first time I had ever had it and I loved it! It's crazy because I hate most of the ingredients. (Squash? UGH. I remember that being a hill I was ready to die on as a youth.) But you have got to try it!! Even my kids will eat it (with a little ranch dressing to spice it up.) Okay, correction, Jackson ate it, but Sam didn't, but Sam doesn't count because he doesn't eat anything but bread and macaroni unless I trick him!!

Here's the yummy recipe and it is even good reheated, I think.

4 medium baking potatoes, shredded (I cheated and defrosted a bag of hash browns)
1 md onion
2 eggs, beaten
1/4 c of flour
1 tsp salt
1 T olive oil
1 md zucchini, sliced thin
1 md yellow squash, sliced thin
1 md yellow or red bell pepper (all I had on hand was green and that worked just fine)
1 sm red onion, sliced thin
2 cloves garlic (I used a few small spoons of pre-minced garlic - I don't do garlic - too messy)
goat cheese (Alouette -I think- is my favorite brand - I use it alot with different recipes)
cherry tomatoes, sliced thin
2 T. basil
1 c shredded mozzerella

If you used potatoes instead of hash browns, shred potatoes and onion. Add eggs, flour, and salt and press onto a pizza pan (I sprayed mine first with Pam to prevent sticking, and it still stuck a little.) Bake at 425 for 15 minutes. Take crust out of oven, brush with 1T of olive oil and put back in oven for 10 more minutes at 425. Then turn up heat and broil for 2-3 minutes or until golden and crisp. While crust is in oven, combine zucchini, yellow squash, pepper, onion, and garlic in a skillet with remaining olive oil and cook until crisp and tender, stirring often. Spread goat cheese on crispy potato crust and top with veggies and tomatoes. Sprinkle with mozzerella and basil. Bake for 5-7 minutes more at 425. Yum-Yum-YUMMO! I wish I had taken a picture to show you the finished product, but alas, we dug in too quickly!!

Blessings & Trials

2010-09-01T16:47:00.000-07:00

Well, you were all right. I just had to not only have faith, but leave my problem in the hands of the Lord and it all worked out. As soon as I MADE myself stop stressing about my low enrollment, I got call after call after call. And now I'm full. Completely.

I have been bitten by the craft bug lately and so I made this as a reminder to myself of the lesson I learned from this experience.
As for Jackson being potty-trained, well, he is still 100% pee potty trained, but a week after we got back from the camping trip, he decided the pooping thing was just not his favorite thing again, and so here we are - he is still pooping his pants. I have tried everything. Yes. Everything. I give up. I'm just cleaning up poopy underwear. It isn't that bad. He'll get it. Eventually. Oh well. Sigh...

Today is the first full day of our 8 weeks without Ben. He will be doing a 4 week rotation in Tulsa and then a 4 week rotation in Temple, TX. We already miss him so much. Yesterday when he left, Jackson hugged his neck super tight and said, "Don't LEAVE me, Daddy!!" in this horrible pitiful voice that brought tears to my eyes. But on a lighter note, the other day Ben and I watched New Moon together and I mentioned that although yes, he is very young, I found Taylor Lautner to be quite attractive. To be funny, Ben left a Taylor Lautner poster tacked to the ceiling above our bed when he left. LOL, I'm going to miss my funny husband.

I have been receiving harassing obscene phonecalls at all hours of the day and night since July. I have reported this to the police, and they have assigned a detective to my case. I have traced the call and the phone company forwarded this information to the police, who got a subpoena for his phone records. They think they know who the guy is now, they are just still trying to track him down. Side note - during the same time period that he has been calling me, he has made 4,200 other phonecalls from that number. Meanwhile, I am still getting the phonecalls. I don't answer usually, but this morning I was half asleep and picked up the phone without checking the caller ID, and it was him...what a wonderful way to wake up...with a sexual proposition. At least I am quite sure, along with the police, that the pervert is not one and the same as my creepy neighbor.

Jackson's 3rd birthday was yesterday. It passed fairly uneventfully as we are planning a Super Mario family birthday party for him this weekend when we are in Tulsa for the long weekend, visiting Daddy and relaxing with family. Here are some pictures of what I am working on. (The cupcake tower is the idea I am going to work off of when I make his cupcakes. They haven't actually been made yet. Pics of actual cupcake tower to come...)

Lost Book

2010-08-17T18:32:00.000-07:00

I'm not sure if this is a testament to how much he LOOOVES books or a testament to the fact that he is his mother's son and MUST keep a strict routine, but tonight when it was time to go to bed, Jackson was trying to stall and ran away from me and hid in the kitchen. So I went upstairs and I waited and waited, and then I counted and nothing, so finally when I was going back down the stairs about to spank him, he came. I told him that since he was being silly and didn't come when I told him it was time for bed, we wouldn't have time for a book tonight. Oh.man. You would have thought someone died. As I type I can hear him in his room, kicking his feet and writhing around in his bed, sans monitor, SCREAMING bloody murder for a book. Is it strange that I feel both frustrated and proud at the same time? :)

Panic

2010-08-16T11:14:00.000-07:00

Well, I'm officially starting to panic. First day of school was today and not only do I not have full enrollment, but I have 4 empty spots and only one child showed up for the first day of school. Everyone else decided to keep their kids until EMS-ISD starts next week. That means for this week I have lost more hundreds of dollars. I have gotten a few phonecalls and one tour, but nothing has panned out. I was even going to accept a child at 3am since his mother had a wierd work schedule just to get some kids in here, but then his mom changed her mind and her mom is going to keep him. What are we going to do!?

Also, I got a notice in the mail that our children's Medicaid is being cancelled because I didn't turn in some extra documentation that they requested, but I did, so I guess they didn't get it. We have insurance for Jack and Sam till Aug 31. I am freaking out here. I am doing every thing I know to do. I have fasted, searched the scriptures, going to church every week, trying to live righteously, having FHE by myself with my kids, praying, praying and more praying. NOthing like this has ever happened to me before when I was doing all the right things, and it seems like the hits just keep coming. Why!? I don't know what else to do. I'm trying to be faithful and in the meantime advertising like crazy and offering specials, etc, but nothing is working!!

This says it all...

2010-08-11T10:43:00.000-07:00

Be not afraid of your own past - plunge into the sublime seas, dive deep. And swim far, so you shall come back with self-respect and a new power. With an advanced experience that shall explain and overlook the old. --Ralph Waldo Emerson

Found that quote today and I love it. It says what I believe about my own life and experiences. Just thought I'd share.

Samson, 15 months (almost)

2010-08-08T20:04:00.000-07:00

Sam is so hilarious these days. He is such a little boy lately instead of a baby, and his vocabulary grows every day. For my own documentation (Because I still look back at my Jackson posts to compare), I wanted to record some of the new things he says and does.

Words he can say:

Mama

Daddy

No-no-no (with scolding finger)

Dooooon-toukk (Don't touch)

Jjsh (juice)

Hi-eee (Hi)

Bah-Bah (Bye-bye)

Ni-Ni (Night-night)

dawh (dog) (The woof-woof sound shortly follows)

duh (duck - not so good at the execution of this animal sound, but he does try)

DAH-duh (Jackson)

Ow!

Whoa!

YAAAY! (with clapping)

Peeeee (Please)

Mooh (More, which he can also sign)

Tanka (comes out throaty at the end -Thank you)

He can also fold his arms for prayer on demand, give a scolding finger with the no-no, show you where his hair and nose are (and other parts of face on a good day), and he is starting to sing what sounds like the Alphabet song. He can tell you the sounds that a car, a dog, a cat (MEEEE-OOOOW, super dramatic), and a cow make. He gives hugs and kisses with sound effects, too.

But my favorite thing is how much he LOOVES his brother Jackson. If Sam is awake and running around, you can always find him following close behind Jackson. If Jackson plays with blocks, Sam is, too. If Jackson watches a movie, Sam does, too. If Jackson is playing Nintendo (or trying to), Sam is sitting there holding the spare controller, too.

...Like a Mustard Seed

2010-08-08T12:47:00.000-07:00

Sometimes I am so prideful that when I hear the phrase, "Have Faith," I just get so frustrated.

What if I am doing the absolute best I can to be right with the Lord, and I fervently pray about something, and I feel like the Lord is pleased with me, but then signs in my life point to otherwise?

I really need a couple of changes to occur in my life, and they just aren't happening; things that will very soon be very detrimental to my family and my daily life. I keep trying and trying on my end, and I feel like I am pushing against a brick wall. Nothing is happening, so I pray and pray harder, and I focus more on being righteous, but still...nothing. Today, out of a complete loss at what to do and total frustration of how I handled a situation, I decided to just sit down and open my scriptures and just read until I felt inspired with an answer. So I randomly opened my scriptures and found Matthew Ch 17. When I got to the verse where the apostles asked the Lord, "Why could we not cast him out? referring to their attempt to cast a devil out of a crazy child, I thought of "Lord, why am I not being successful at getting this change made in my life?" and I felt that the answer was in the next verse. I'm sure you know it. "And Jesus said unto them, Because of your unbelief: for verily I say unto you, If ye have faith as a grain of mustard seed, ye shall say unto this mountain, Remove hence to yonder place; and it shall remove; and nothing shall be impossible unto you."

Argh! I DO have faith!! I mean, I know the Lord will answer my prayer, and that it may not be the answer I want, but what does that mean? That doesn't tell me what to do!? That I just sit here and wait? Doing nothing? And my problem will just be fixed? Or keep trying and trying, getting nowhere, meanwhile, instead of moving forward, I'm being pushed backwards by some invisible force until I am looking over the cliff I am about to fall over!? I just keep telling myself that the Lord knows how much I can handle, so even if I think I can't handle it, and might go crazy, He will take care of me, but I'm just such a dang control freak, that I admit I am panicking a little!! I feel like I am already walking through the valley of the shadow of death, how much closer to I have to get before I lose it!?

I want to go home. I miss my family. I know they would help me if they could. I don't want to be an adult anymore. Can I close my eyes and be a teenager again, like this is all a bad dream!? I promise that I'll be good this time, and I'll be the sweetest to my mother who I was so horrible to!! I'll be the best example to my little sister and brother...let me try that whole teenager thing again and then maybe I'll be a little better prepared to be an adult woman on my own. Are there do-overs? :)

POTTY-TRAINED!!

2010-08-02T12:17:00.000-07:00

...And we are officially POTTY TRAINED! Fully. Yes, that's right. He pooped. and pooped. and pooped again.

So now we can pee-pee in the potty. Sleep in underwear at night and at naptime with no accidents. (That has actually never been an issue, thankfully.) And now we can poop. Okay, so I have always been able to do that, lol, so when I say we, I really mean Jackson...:)

I have definitely been taught a lesson here, and that is that nothing is too small to pray about. I had thought it was too trivial for prayer, and although it has been a major struggle in our lives now for months, I kept trying to handle it on my own. Finally, Jackson and I both came to a traumatizing point in the potty training process, and we both added it to our prayers, and I guess that was all the Lord needed. Less than a week later, Jackson has absolutely no fear about pooping in the potty.

Strangely, the first time he was successful was while we were on our family camping trip. He really wanted his bb gun that his Papa De had brought for a present (Don't even get me started on that...picture fumes coming out of my ears...nuff said), so I told him that I would only get it down for him if he would go poo poo on the potty Daddy had built for us at our cabin. (It was a potty seat attached to a metal chair frame - rustic, but better than being in the very vulnerable position of squatting in the dark, praying fervently that the slight brush against your naked bum was a mischievous plant blowing in the wind.) Anyway...you never saw a person get up on a potty and push one out so fast! So of course, we praised him. And praised him. And praised him. We gave him candy, toys, and...grrr... the promised gun. And he got to play with it (unloaded, safety on, and with me and Daddy within arms reach) for a few minutes until he smacked his brother in the head, and then I snatched it back, and then out of sight and out of reach it returned.

We wondered if that experience would transfer, and the first day back at home he was't interested, but when we reminded him about his gun, we have had no problems since. Every day since we have been back, he has made a bowel movement. No constipation, no tears, no turmoil. At this point, if I had to dip a little into redneckville to acheive said status, then so be it!! Actually, I have been fairly successful at distracting him from the gun reward and giving himcandy or toy rewards instead. After a 2 week period, I hope to remove all treats and we'll just have a completely potty-independent kid!

I'm in love!!

2010-07-16T19:19:00.000-07:00

A friend of mine shared a link to this website on fb, and I have found myself absolutely glued to it, so I added it to my blogs that I follow.

http://shanty2chic.blogspot.com

Here is a project I found from following a couple of links, originating on that page. I am planning on doing since we are currently redoing our bathroom. My bathroom project started with Ben FINALLY putting in a new tile floor since ours for the last year has been the wood floor under the carpet I ruined when I was pregnant with Sam and left a bath running for 45 minutes. Since we were redoign 9ur floors, I decided the bathroom (which has never been painted and it still yucky builders off white) needed a fresh coat of paint. I bought a new shower curtain, rugs, and accessories to match and was just thinking abotu how to decorate the walls when this project came along.

Now to actually do it!! Well, it IS summertime and I HAVE been saying that I wanted to do stuff like this when I have more time. No time like the present right? I have been feeling particularly crafty lately...

One year and 2 months later...

2010-07-15T14:18:00.000-07:00

My how they've grown, huh? They keep me laughing every day. Jackson is so truly sweet to Sam and Sam looks up to Jackson SOOO much. He follows him around everywhere. It is funny to see them interact and play with each other. Sometimes they are just being silly laughing at something that only they get, but it makes us all smile! I hope they always get along this well, but I won't count on it. :)

And then there was #2

2010-06-11T10:08:00.000-07:00

I was awakened this morning to the sound of a frantic pounding on Jackson's door and him hollering, "MAMA! I need-a go pee-pee!" About a month ago we had put the childproof lock back on the inside door knob of his door because his newfound freedom was causing him to think it was time to get up every time he woke up, even if he happened to wake up at 5:30 am. Anyway, I rushed in to let him out and take him to go potty, and his diaper was dry, and he peed on th epotty...a lot! YAY, victory #1.

Later we dressed to go to the gym, taking a potty break before we left, and being the forgetful rushed mommy that I am, I did not remember to take him while we were there. We had to leave the gym early since Sam had suddenly decided that 45 minutes was way too long without mama. On the way home, we hit up Sonic and got a snack to help us be happy for our next errand, the car wash. After the car wash, we ran over for one thing at Wal-mart, but when we got there (at this point, I had completely forgotten about potty breaks and such), I noticed Jackson dancing around a lot. I said, "Jackson, do you need to go potty?" "Yes," he said, so we raced to the front of the dtore (we came in the side at the auto center) and we made it! Dry diaper, and LOTS of pee-pee. The time in which he had held it was almost 3 hours and that was with a sippy sup of juice and most of a small Sonic slush in his bladder! YAY, victory #2.

We got home, had lunch, and during which, Jackson said he needed to go potty again, so I got him down and helped him go, and again, DRY diaper and a successful #1 in the potty! YAY! Victory #3.

After lunch, he got really agitiated and danced around again, straining and saying that he needed a blanket - this means he needs to go poop and wants to hide himself from my view. We have not been pushing the #2 in the potty because he is so freaked out by it that he will simply NOT go. for days. We had to give him 2 doses of laxatives over 2 days one time to get him to finally just get it out, so we always encourage him to go no matter what for that need. But this time, he was in the middle of the act, so I just raced him into the bathroom, stripped him down and had him finish the push and let the #2fall in the potty, and we made it! No poop in the diaper, no screaming meltdown about pooping in the potty, and a technical successful poop in the potty! Now I know this isn't our end goal, but I'm hoping that maybe it is a step in teh right direction because he was so dang proud of that poop, you'd have thought he deserved a gold medal! Of course, I made a big deal about it, too, so here's hoping'! YAY! 4 potty victories at the Blake house today! Maybe, just maybe, we'll be completely pee-pee trained for GrandMollie next week and she'll only have to worry about poop accidents. (GrandMollie is keeping the boys for me Wed-Sat while I am at girls' camp next week.)

12 months of Samson Jay Blake

2010-06-03T18:13:00.000-07:00

This is a little belated since Sam's birthday was actually May 22...Happy Birthday, Sam! You are sure a blessed addition to our eternal family. You are so happy, and funny, smart and loving! I don't know how we ever lived without you in our lives!

The sweetest thing...

2010-06-01T11:09:00.001-07:00

is when Jackson randomly says, "Mama, you're my best friend." I just wanna squeeze him silly with hugs when he says that to me. He is also VERY into Book of Mormon stories right now. He likes all the fighting and action. :)

His favorite book is a Book of Mormon stories board book we got him. He loves the Alma the Younger story, and also frequently requests that Living Scriptures video as well. I'm not sure why he prefers that one over others, but that is his favorite.

Sam has added a few new words to his vocabulary lately, too. He shakes his little finger and says, "nonono," He walks over and says it to Jackson when he is in time out, he scolds the preschoolers with it, and he even does it when he is getting into something he knows he isn't suposed to get into. Think he has heard that a few times? ;)

Sam's other new word, which we rarely hear, but has been witnessed by GrandMollie, is "Peeeese." He doesn't really know how to use it yet, but hey, at least he can say it, right?

Sam is now a full fledged walker. He can even stand himslef up completely, without pulling himslef up. He is quite speedy now, too. He almost keeps up with the preschoolers running around. He loves to walk around and explore outside.

Today I took him tot he doctor tho because he had two goopy eyes that only seemed to be getting worse with time, and yes, he has a double bacterial eye infection. We got his one year stats while we were there tho. 24 lbs, 29.25 inches long, and 18 in head circumference.

Summer, I love you...

2010-05-24T11:06:00.000-07:00

I love the sun, it just cheers me up. I don't even care that it is humid outside and I get sweaty just running errands. It gives me life and energy. If I could, I'd live in molten hot weather all my life, preferably near a beach somewhere, but I'm realistic, so I'll take Texas sumemrs.

I love the excuse to wear less clothes instead of bundling up in thousands of layers to stay warm. I love summer clothes: t-shirts, shorts and flip flops.

I love working out in the heat, and the challenge it presents in extra conditioning.

I love the smells of freshly cut grass, and grilled food wafting through the warm breeze.

I love summer food: fruit, like watermelon and strawberries that are SO good this time of year, and grilled foods: hot dogs, hamburgers, steaks, etc.

I love to get a tan on my skin, and that I get to wear less makeup because of it.

I love outdoor water activities, going to the lake, and trips to Hurricane Harbor. I love to watch my kids laughing in the sprinkler. I love the excuse to play in my swimsuit all day.

I love the inherent laziness and lethary of summer, and yet, the flurry of fun activities that we get to do because we have so much time off.

I love outdoor projects and landscaping and time to do home improvements.

I love camping and hiking and all things outside, even if I get sweaty. I don't care, I like to sweat!!

I'm so excited for my summer break to begin! 8 more days!!

Missionary Conversation

2010-05-16T18:38:00.001-07:00

Lately I have been really impressed with Jackson's mental abilities. He is remembering, recalling and understanding so much these days. He randomly tells me and/or Ben the activities of his day, things he liked/didn't like, when kids got in trouble, and what for, and things he learned. He is really turning into a little boy! I love it!

This evening when I put Jackson to bed, we went through our normal bedtime routine of bath, teeth brushing, book reading, and prayer. Tonight, as I tucked him in, I asked him if he wanted to sing a song before bed. He had been singing The Happy Family Primary Song lately and I didn't teach it to him, so I suggested we sing it, but he said, no, he wanted to sing, "I Hope They Call Me On a Mission."

So we sang that instead, and afterward I seized a teachable moment and said, "Do you know what a missionary is?"
"No, " he said.
"Missionaries are teachers, just like I am a teacher, but I teach kids about ABCs and counting, and when you are a missionary, you get to teach people about Heavenly Father and Jesus. Do you want to do that?"
"Yeah!" he said.
"You want to be a missionary?" I asked.
"Yeah, I want to be a missionary and teach my friends."
Very excited and a little proud, I said, "You do? That will make me and Heavenly Father so happy."
Still thinking, he said, "Yeah, I want to be a missionary...and I want to be Frosty the Snowman."

Hmmmph...maybe he doesn't quite understand as much as I thought. :)

Guns, Toddlers, and the Rangers!!

2010-05-15T19:50:00.000-07:00

No one ever told me that when you have boys, anything and everything is turned into a gun. Literally. Wrapping paper in our cart at Wal-Mart turned into a lethal weapon and Wal-mart patrons were enemies. A peanut butter sandwich strategically bitten looks similar to a gun and coupled with my favorite *read sarcasm* shooting sound, it's like WWIII in our kitchen. My list goes on and on...play tools = guns, sticks = guns, Tinkertoys = guns, blocks put together juuuust right = guns, sometimes even things that couldn't possibly look at all like a gun, surprisingly will work just fine. I am NOT a fan of this gun phase. Anyone else have experience with this or should I be worried?

I have outlawed gun-play in the preschool with strict consequences, which may seem silly, but public schools are strict on this issue, too, I know, so I am trying to be consistent with what they do. He really didn't get into guns until a new kid started coming to our school who likes to make shooting sounds. Even Sam has started making the popular sound. Should I just throw up my hands and hope the phase passes, or should I continue with the anti-gun-play rule?

Sam is going to be one next week, and he does so much for himself now. He is an excellent walker, almost never falling (unless Jackson pushes him down, which sadly, is frequent), and I even watched him just this week master bending at the waist to pick up a toy and standing back up all without the aid of a nearby table or chair. He says Mama, Dada, claps hooray, and occasionally waves bye-bye, but doesn't say it yet. He can point to the basic parts of my face on a good day, but always knows nose. Lately we have been working on animal names and sounds, but the only one he says upon request is duck, and it comes out "Da" which is just Dada, with only one Da. He loves to play chase and laughs heartily when he is chasing Jack or me or when Daddy is chasing him to tickle him. He also has entered the love for Elmo stage. This is convenient since Jackson loved Elmo, too, and we already have a ton of Elmo gear. He will eat completely on his own, but he is such a picky eater! Jackson woudl anything and everything, so I have struggled with this. His least favorite thing to eat is any kind of meat. I try to hide it in small bites mixed in with applesauce or baby food, but he finds it in his mouth, uses his tongue to hold onto it, swallows the other food, and then spits out the meat. Little stinker!!

This is Sam trying to steal food off of Jackson's tray...so he won't eat his own food, but he'll steal his brothers'!

We have been to two Texas Rangers baseball games this month and took Jackson to both (we got a sitter for Sam). He was really good, especailly considering he was up past bedtime. The second game had fireworks, which, of course, he got super-excited about. Now he walks aroudn the house randomly shouting, "Let's go Rangers...(clap, clap, clap-clap-clap)" or "Let's go, C. JAYYY! (pitcher)" or "GOOOOOO Rangers!!!" I'm glad he is getting excited about sports and I can't wait to watch him play his first game of t-ball. For an almost 3 year old, he is fairly coordinated and athletic. He is a good dribbler, too, so I hope he might find some interest in soccer, but I won't push it.

This is an awesome blog!

2010-05-03T11:19:00.000-07:00

If you don't already know about it, check out "Or so she says..." It is the 1/2 owned blog of one of my adolescent friends, Mariel. I just found some really cool DIY mother's day gift ideas on here. If you are looking for something like that, you have got to check it out!

Here is the site:

Spring Celebrations and Surprises

2010-04-15T18:06:00.000-07:00

Two 2-year-olds in "jail" (behind the soccer net).

Everyone loves Sam, especially his self-appointed second mom, Sophia. Although you can't tell from his expression, he loves her, too.

Easter bunny glasses!! This isn't the whole group, only about a third of it, but these were the ones willing to pose for the picture.

Best Friends - Sam hates to be separated from Jack and well, Jack mostly likes to have his tag-along brother with him. They even have a special scream they call each other with.

"Hey! I found one!"

"This Easter egg hunt is wearing me out! I gotta take a candy break..." Sam found the biggest (and might I add BEST) egg ever!

I just LOVE these boys!

In the midst of hunting, look what else Jack found!

and here is his reaction...

This is Sam's new favorite thing. Good thing Jackson still loves Elmo, too, because we had moved past the Sesame Street phase, but he will still patiently watch SS with Sam.

Ben put up a tent in the backyard, thinking he'd sleep in it with Jackson last Sat night. That so did not happen...

but they had a blast playing in it after naptime on Sunday!

How does YOUR garden grow?

2010-04-10T11:36:00.000-07:00

After 'me n the boys' got home from the gym this morning, I fed them lunch and put them down for naps. They stayed up very late last night since we made a huge family trip to the grocery store, and Sam doesn't believe in sleeping in no matter what time he went to bed, ergo Jackson was awakened early, too. Anyway, long story short (too late for that, huh?), they are both taking super long naps right now.

Ben was outside doing yard work and it was a beautiful day so I joined him to weed my flowerbeds for the first time this year. When I say flowerbeds, I really just mean beds where flowers should go, as I have yet to plant any this year. On that note, flowers are so dang expensive! What if I planted seeds? Does anyone have any experience with that? What types of flower seeds would I likely be most successful with? I tried to plant seeds last year for the preschoolers to have flowers in the Mother's Day flowerpots they made, but it didn't go so well and I ended up buying some flowers and putting them in the pots with some soil. Any tips you have are much appreciated because my flowerbeds are longing for some beautiful color in them, but I just can't afford to fill them all with already grown flowers.

As I was working in my front flower bed, trimming back the dead canna debris to make room for the new shoots, I was thinking about the state of my flower beds and the backyard in general. (We are having a hard time keeping grass in the backyard since 10 preschoolers are stomping on it for over an hour every day.)

I was thinking about the last house I owned and remembering working in the front yard in my flowerbeds, and how when I moved out, how sad I was that I didn't have time to do more landscaping. I had a beautiful little yard with lots of older developed trees and shade. I had a pear tree in the backyard and some very pretty bushes and flowers in the front beds. My old yard had such potential to be a place of beauty and peace with just a little cultivation, but the marriage deteriorated and I moved out of the house and lost the yard.

As I was reflecting on that and ripping out and trimming back dead debris from my current yard, I noted how quickly things can deteriorate in life if they are not nourished. I was making the comparison (and bear with me cuz I'm no green thumb) that our lives are a lot like plants and flowers. My previous marrige was not rooted in the gospel, and so it had no solid foundation and no continuous nourishment from good things to help it grow and flourish. It started with so much potential, but wilted fast without getting what it needed to sustain life.

This analogy can apply currently as well. Sometimes we get so busy with life that we let obstacles hinder us from stretching up towards the sun's nourishing light. Other times, unimportant objects can blow into our flower beds and trash it up or we neglect to weed our flowerbeds and the focus on the beauty of the garden as a whole (eternal perpsective) is lost. If we don't make time to constantly clear those things out, so that our nourishment can be constant, we will begin to wilt as well.

Anyway, just seem deep Colleen thoughts I thought I'd share. I like to try to make everything an analogy. I don't know why, but it helps me understand things better, I guess.

The best part of my day...

2010-03-27T18:36:00.000-07:00

Wow, what a day I had today!

The culmination of all my training: Ab Crunch Challenge! Up till today, the maximum number I had crunched was 1200. My goal was 1500. Today I crunched 3,194 times, and I didn't even place. First place did over 5000, second place did 3700, and third place did 3400.

Ben came to watch me, and they asked him to be my counter which we hadn't planned on, but it was so awesome to feel his support while I tested my limits. For some reason I always feel this need to prove to him that I'm no weak woman! That (among many reasons) is why I always want him by my side during labor. I'll push myself harder if he is there. He was whispering encouragement the whole time and telling me how proud he was of me. He is just awesome!

I was a little disappointed that I didn't place as I'm a pretty competitive person. So after I put the boys down for a nap, (Ben was watching a movie.) I decided to go for a run. I wasn't sure how much I'd be able to run, but my stomach was not sore after crunching, just numb, so I thought I'd just see how it went and stop if I felt like I needed to. I ran 6 miles in 57 minutes., topping my previous record (last week) of 5 in 45 min.

(This competition has aroused a desire in me to compete in something athletic. I'd like to run a marathon, learn to rockclimb, start training to kickbox competitively, or re-join an indoor soccer team. I have always had such a need to push myself physically and I realize it is something I have been missing in my life.)

For dinner this evening, we had homemade shrimp alfredo (YUM) and for dessert I made a strawberry shortcake with strawberry cake, a strawberry and strawberry glaze mixture, and a whipped cream/cream cheese topping (YUM YUM).

After dinner we were able to bribe Jackson to poop in the potty (barely) with some dessert. We made quite a fuss over the smallest poop you ever saw, but at least it was a step in the right direction! :)

Also today, Sam decided to accompish many milestones in one day. (Recently he started clapping. It is super cute! We can just say, "YAY!" and he starts clapping. It is also really cute how he sometimes acts bashful and hides his head under his arms when we clap with him.) Today I asked him, "Where's mama's nose?" and he reached out with his little pointer finger and, with his tongue hanging out of his mouth, he touched my nose! I was astonished that he actually did it, so I asked him to do it two more times and he did. Then I asked him to show me my mouth and my eyes; he did those also! What a little smartie I have! He just barely turned 10 months!!

He also started saying Mama today. Out of the blue, he was sitting in Ben's lap, trying to get down and crawl to me, and clear as day, he babbled, Mamamamamama. Ben put him down and he crawled right to where Jackson and I were playing Memory. Of course, that was the end of the game as Sam wanted to put all the cards in his mouth and we couldn't keep up with his octopus arms, but it was awesome!

But the absolute best part of my day was when Sam and I had a few moments to ourselves as I gave him a bath and got him ready for bed separate from Jackson tonight. We played in the bath, had a one-sided mini-tickle fight, and then I dressed him, read him a story, and rocked him as I sang hymns to him. He NEVER sits still enough for me to rock him lately, so it was such a moment. When we started, I had him facing forward, but he turned himself around and snuggled up to me and buried his face in my shoulder while I sang. In that moment, I felt the Spirit confirm to me that Heavenly Father was pleased with me and my family, and I cried a little because I was just so overwhelmed with love for my child and happiness with my life.

Bad Dream

2010-03-26T11:26:00.000-07:00

Do you ever remember things that happened a long time ago and feel like they happened yesterday? And do they make you angry? Like a dream that felt so real that when you woke up the emotions carried over?

I'm struggling today. I don't know why, but things have been brought to the front of my mind today that I wish I could pretend happened to someone else.

Every day I am so happy and grateful for the blessings that I have in my life. That I probably don't deserve. But dang it!! I'm going to hold tight to them and work every day to BE deserving of them.

When these angry feelings get the better of me, I know they threaten my happiness and the happiness of my family and marriage. It is such a struggle to fight them off!

Like the dream, I tell myself it isn't relevant to my current reality, but nevertheless, my mind keeps floating back to the angry thoughts and I get re-angered.

Forgiveness is a daily battle, I'm convinced. I never knew that until I had to do it. I thought you could just snap your fingers and say ,"I forgive you," and that was it. All was restored to a peaceful balance. Not so. At least for me.

And you know what? It is totally Satan. And I know that. My Heavenly Father who loves me so much, and blesses me so much, wants me to be happy, and to let it go. And I want to.

So I'm going to fight the fight.

Potty Frustrations

2010-03-24T11:06:00.000-07:00

Monday (our first day back in the swing of things) was a great day and Jackson went all day in big boy underwear with no accidents (made for day 2 of no accidents). Till we got to the gym that night. This is his second accident at the gym and the pee gets all over the floor, so the day care worker asked me to stop sending him in underwear, to put him in pull-ups when he comes to the gym. Sigh...embarrassing.

Tuesday was a horrible day. Accidents all over the place and I finally had to put him in a pull-up because I had changed his clothes 3 times. Today has been better, but still at least 2 accidents, but I just didn't have the energy to put him in underwear today because he has seemed to regress a little and I think it is causing him to hold his poop in and not go. He still tells me when he needs to go pee-pee, but then sometimes he goes and doesn't tell me.

He has yet to poop in the potty. He was so afraid that he hasn't pooped for 3 days. Finally last night we had to give him some laxative powder. Solved that problem and he has been tooting all day - which he thinks is hilarious, and so do the preschoolers.

I think we are going to get through Thur and Fri doing the best we can and have another naked weekend this weekend. Like I said, if we could just get him to poop in the potty, I really think we'd break that barrier. He gets so upset when he has a pee accident! I really think he has been trying hard with the pee, but the whole constipated thing has messed him up. He'll strain, trying to poop, and pee instead. I don't want him to get frustrated because so far he has had such a positive attitude about everything, just not pooping. I don't know why he is so stressed about it, but I don't want to make it worse.

Sigh...

Potty Progress

2010-03-21T08:25:00.001-07:00

WARNING: At some point, I plan to have my blog bound as a hard copy of my journal, so many things I document for my records and family reference. The following blog is about potty-training and may include more details than you want to read. Proceed at your own risk!
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I vowed to put everything I had into Potty training Jackson this Spring Break since we weren't planning on going anywhere this year. He did really well, and made several steps in the right direction. I truly believe that he would be potty trained already if I had the time to be more consistent with him, but when you are taking care of 10 kids and 4 are still in diapers...you forget. A lot. Whenever we really try to encourage him , he jumps right in and goes potty. He is proud of himself and he likes to go, so I couldn't in good conscience give up until I had given it one last good try.

On Friday, Jackson didn't have any accidents all day (I don't count the time he peed a little on the carpet because he was trying to push out a little toot, haha)!! He will now tell me he needs to go pee-pee and go take care of it completely on his own, but only if he is naked. If he is dressed, he doesn't even think about it.

Several times when he was naked, he needed to go poop. He wigged out!! The first time, he came running toward the bathroom all flustered, saying "I wanna lay down! I wanna lay down!" (That is what he says sometimes if he has a poopy diaper and wants me to change it.) and as he was running, I saw a little poop hit the floor. When I realized he needed to poop more, I tried to get him to sit on the potty and he would sit, but the second he was about to go, he'd freak out and jump up. I don't know why, but he seems to be scared to poop in the potty.

I told him he'd get in trouble if he pooped or peed on my carpet, and that seemed to work - no more accidents on the carpet when he was naked. (Not my finest moment of parenting, but I did that because he sees our new puppy get a spanking when she has an accident on the carpet and it seemed to connect with him that the carpet is NOT the place to go if he needs to. I tell him puppies pee-pee and poo-poo outside and big boys go potty in the potty, but we do NOT go potty on the carpet.)

Since then every time he needs to poop, he runs back and forth from the playroom to the potty. He'll sit, then jump up and run away, then he'll come back and sit, and then jump up and run away. He has yet to poop in the potty. He needs to go right now, in fact, and he keeps begging me to put his diaper and jammies back on. I keep refusing and telling him that big boys go poo-poo in the potty and if he needs to go, he should go sit down. We have tried sitting there and singing songs and I have even promised him a Chocolate Santa left over from Christmas which he wants more than anything!! I feel like we are close and if I can just get him to sit and go, we'd break that barrier, and he'd see it's not scary, and we'd be mostly done with potty training.

I wish today wasn't the last day of Spring Break because I feel like if I could just have a couple more naked days and then maybe a transitional few days in big boy underwear, then we'd be there, but I worry what will happen when all the kids come back tomorrow.

Welcome Spring!

2010-03-21T08:04:00.000-07:00

(This picture is wishful thinking...)

This weekend Ben went back to Woody Woods to work more on the cabin and hunt a little. He didn't get a Spring Break, so he was in dire need of some down time away from the stresses of life. He recruited his dad, my brother and my father to go with him.

Yesterday was the first day of Spring. This Spring Break has been absolutely beautiful weather, with temperatures reaching above 70, but Saturday (yesterday) was the one day we were almost guaranteed a day-long thunderstorm and cold-front. Saturday morning that cold front cold very cold, and the rain turned to unexpected sleet and snow and we.got.pelted!

I made a trip to Wal-mart at about 7:00 with Jackson, while my mom (who stayed with me in FW) stayed with a sleeping Samson. The conditions at that time were blizzard-like. As I was trying to get Jackson & groceries in the car after shopping, the strong winds blew my cart away several times and my door slammed shut twice. The snow was coming down so strong I had to close my eyes and protect my face from stinging sleet. We didn't end up getting much snow that stuck this morning, but what we did get turned to a layer of ice. As we watched the news debating on whether we should go to church, we saw that there were many accidents and even some fatalities already by 9 a.m. (We decided NOT.)

So now I am worried about our men coming home from East Texas where temps did NOT get below freezing and they got off and on thunderstorms. I cannot call them because they are deep in the Davy Crockett National Forest (We have family land and a cabin there.) and they get no service. I can only hope that by the time they get to this area, the roads (and temperature) will be warmed up and used enough that they will no longer be hazardous.

However, my FIL and my family have to continue on to Tulsa. Tulsa was expected to get up to 10 inches of snow and temperatures will not be above freezing until Monday afternoon. We'll have to see what my dad thinks when he gets here, but I predict that they will be staying here an extra day!

Photo Update - V Day to Spring Break

2010-03-17T07:47:00.000-07:00

Jackson was watching a movie before bed and got seats for his baby bear and his puppy to watch it with him. I just thought that was so cute.

"The guys" are taking a ride in Daddy's shoes.

Bathtime with brother is so fun!! "He got me all wet," is what Jackson says. He doesn't like Sam's splashing, but they both laugh a lot.

Sam is Mr. Mischief these days. Today I caught him splashing around in an open potty. Heaven help me when he starts really walking. He could if he wanted to right now, and he has taken a few steps, but he is such a speedy crawler he doesn't want to take the time to try to walk. It slows him down too much.

Last Friday we were playing "sleepy zombies". Mama was a sleepy zombie chasing him, and Jackson has a bad habit of running without watching where he is going and this time the couch taught him a not-so-fun lesson. It looks better now. He didn't get the complete black ring around his eye, but he had a nasty cut and bruise on his eyelid.

February date night: We went to Main Event. We bowled, played in the arcade, ate dinner, and even played some laser tag.

We got a four day weekend for President's Day courtesy of record-breaking snowfall. I only had one kid in school that day so we adopted him into our family for the day. We made snow forts, had a snowball fight, and then warmed up with hot chocolate. It was a fun February surprise!

Family

2010-03-04T11:24:00.000-08:00

So Mrs. Olivia and I were talking today about the kids while they were cleaning up and transitioning to handwashing/lunch. We came to the conclusion that not one single child I have ever had in my (full-time) care has a complete original family originating from the same two biological parents who are still together. Not one. Here is the breakdown:

Total of adopted children I have had in care: 4

Total of children being raised by a single parent: 4

Total of children with one or more parents remarried, with half-siblings: 4

I am just stating facts here. I have been remarried myself, and could have easily had a child from that marriage, so I'm not judging. I just think these stats say something about the deterioration of the family, and how Satan will go to great lengths to destroy it.

Now, in contrast, every single kid I have ever had in part-time care (don't know why that makes a difference) HAS come from a two-parent, original biological parents, non-half siblings family.

Makes me grateful to have an eternal family!!

Sick of Sickness

2010-02-23T11:29:00.000-08:00

I am so sick of my kids being sick.

and the preschoolers being sick.
and the wiping of runny noses and dispensing medicine
and sanitizing and cleaning up the hoards of tissues we are going through.
and the phlegmmy coughs, that sometimes turn to puking (in Sam's case).
and checking kids temperatures to see if they need to be sent home.
and the non-sleeping.
and the crankiness.
and the fact that it is too cold to go outside and the kids are too sick anyway when I just want them to run around and wear themselves out and stop whining and fussing over every little accidental "Jackson-bumped-into-me" or overreacted "EEEEW! Sam-spit-up!!" or "She-took-my-toy" or "He's-not-cleaning-up."

I'm cranky.

Is it Spring Break yet!?

The novelty has worn off

2010-02-12T19:18:00.000-08:00

Poor Roxy. A week into her new home and she gets no love these days. Of the 2 boys who were so infatuated with the adorable puppy, one crawls up in my lap and clings for dear life when she comes near him, and the other eggs her on until she starts to play too rough and then he gets hurt and wants nothing to do with her. She is quite an exuberant puppy, a side of her we didn't see until this week.

And me?

Well, *sigh* I knew better. I'm cleaning up enough accidents off the carpet with spit-up and potty-training, I wanted nothing to do with this from the start, but saw the value in having a larger and younger dog with fresh ears to protect us when Ben is gone. So, alas, I have one more to clean up after.

I swear, after this, I am ripping up my carpet and staining the concrete! Ben has taken most of the responsibility for training her and cleaning up after her and for that I am grateful. We love her, but we are already ready for the puppy stage to be over with!!

Then there is Lady. She either hides in her crate or in a corner, giving me death-looks, as if to say, "What were you thinking!?" If Roxy chances to get too close, Lady barks and growls ferociously, saying, "Don't even think about it small-fry! I may look old, but I will rip you to shreds if you get in my face again!"

I think it will be a while before we all come to appreciate her fully, but we are being patient. After all, she is really cute...

This is what happens when Daddy does bath and bedtime...

2010-02-08T20:16:00.001-08:00

Your feet look like Curious George! Ben said he realized after he put them on that they were mitten and not socks, but by then he didn't think it really mattered. They kept his feet warm while he slept just the same. Hahahaha! I laughed til I cried!

Introducing our new family member...ROXY!!

2010-02-08T18:47:00.000-08:00

Sometimes I read other people's blogs and I feel sad. Blogs and facebook and church are my only connections to the outside world and I feel like I am missing out on so much! I love what I do, but I focus so much on other people's children, I have no life of my own. I never get to have the missionaries over. I don't get to develop my friendships like I'd like to. I don't get to actively pursue talents outside of teaching and working with kids. I don't get to spend quality one-on-one time with my kids and when I do get to, I'm so tired, I often don't put in as much work with them as I should. I'm so tired from cramming everything I need to get done into my day!!

Now that I have full enrollment (which truly is blessing to our family and I am SOOO grateful), I have at least 3-5 kids from 7:15-5:30. Then I have basically 3 to 3.5 hours to get dinner made, get to the gym, run any errands I need to run, do laundry/dishes/end of day clean up, bathe kids, bedtime routine. So many important things get left out. I was reading a friend's blog about a conversation she had with her 5 year old, and it was so touching how she turned a question into a teaching moment about the Lord, and how she sees her children's lives unfolding in service to Him.

It made me a little depressed with my priorities. Is is absolutely necessary that I do all those things? Can I spare a few minutes to sit down with my children and teach them about the gospel? I will make time! (I have been trying to figure out how to do FHE with our crazy schedule and sometimes alone with young kids?!) So tonight, I put Sam to bed (he has been sick with a yucky cold and running a fever today) and before I put Jackson to bed, I picked a special book that my mom got Jackson for Christmas.

It is this adorable book that tells several stories from Nephi with photography of babies dressed up like the people in the book of Nephi. Anyway, Jackson sat in my lap while we read it and periodically I would sing the refrain to the "I Will Go, I Will Do" Nephi Primary Song. That helped to keep his attention. He loved the pictures, he kept saying,"The babies are sad," which was the perfect opportunity for me to say, "Yes they are sad. That is Laman and Lemuel. They are sad because they weren't making good choices. They didn't want to do what Heavenly Father asked them to do." Then at the end I taught him the Book of Mormon Stories Primary song. We always say a prayer together before he goes to bed, so tonight I suggested that he say thank you for Nephi and help us to be like him and make good choices and do what the Lord wants us to do. Well, it is not much, but what else do you do with a 2.5 year old? That was about max for his attention span and understanding.

On another note, this weekend we got some much needed family time! We finally got the Christmas lights down on the outside of the house, Ben hung some curtains I have been wanting to hang, and we all went out visiting pet stores just casually looking at puppies. We had been talking about getting a new dog, since Lady is about 13 years old now, and she is starting to be a little deaf and doesn't always notice when things should alert her. So...we ended up falling in love with a foster care boxer-terrier mix puppy at PetSmart. We named her Roxy. Since she isn't a full blood boxer (but looks just like one), she isn't supposed to get much above my knee height. To me, that is perfect because I wanted a small dog, but I also wanted a dog to make me feel safe when Ben works nights.

Both the boys were absolutely smitten and Ben loved her, too. I had to be the voice of reason, but even I couldn't resist those big brown eyes! So far she is potty training really well and responds to the command no. She is quiet, but playful. The perfect puppy! I'm sure you will agree after her big brown eyes have hypnotized you, too.

I feel like I haven't blogged in forever...

2010-01-28T19:29:00.000-08:00

Lots of things are going on, good things, too. I just haven't really had the time or inclination to document them.

Here's a quick run-down of the past few weeks...

My neighbor scares me. His son used to be in my preschool for like a minute and he (and his brother, who lives with him) keeps dropping by for stupid reasons and asking me nonchalantly if my husband is home. He lives 3 houses down and can see into my backyard and the back of his house faces the back of my house since I'm in a cul-de-sac. Oh, and did I mention he has done hard time? My friend Katy thinks its nothing, and I'm sure she is right, but I get a creepy, skin-crawling feeling when he is around, always have, even before I knew about the prison time. Plus, before he called to see if his son could come back (which I was able to decline because of the full enrollment - another blessing since the child is a little bit of a discipline problem), I had a dream of two men breaking in to the house separately, but in collusion with each other, and attacking me. Makes for sleepless nights since Ben has been gone a lot lately.

Jackson's potty training is progressing, but in two steps forward, one step back-style. He'll do great all day going pee-pee on the potty, but he has yet to wear a pair of underwear all day without an accident. Tonight we tried more naked time and he peed on the floor not once, not twice, but 4 times! That is insane considering that I take him potty every 30 minutes when his potty watch goes off! Once I caught him trying to poop, but I ran him to the bathroom in the middle of the act and he made it in the potty - barely! Then about an hour later, I checked on him (I could always see him, but unless I reminded him to think about it, he'd have an accident, so I kept having to go in there every 20 min or so and ask him if he needed to go potty.), and he had pooped on the floor in two spots! Gross!!!! Guess he wasn't done earlier when he made it to the potty, grrr!!

This potty training thing is so frustrating. I feel like he is totally on board and wanting to do it just like the other kids and he wants to wear his big-boy underwear over a pull-up, but he doesn't seem to understand when his body needs to go. I don't want to quit because he is so positive about it and so proud of himself when he goes pee-pee in the potty, but at what point should he be able to figure out when he needs to go on his own? I have to take him every 30 min all day or he'll have an accident. Seriously, the two times I took him ten min late, he peed all over himself. Every 30 min is getting old real quick when I have a house full of rambunctious kids and a teething, crawling baby and next week there will be even more. On the other hand, next week, Mrs. Olivia will be here all morning, so maybe I can give it more attention. Should I put this potty-traing thing on hold, or not give up so soon. We've been doing it for about a month now. How long is the average, do you think? If I put it on hold, I won't revisit until this summer when I can give it more attention. I'm not sure if it is better to do it now when he has the big kids' example or this summer when I can focus on it more. Help? What do you veteran mothers think I should do?

Sam is finally getting 2 bottom teeth. He has been a little fussy, but not nearly as bad as Jackson was. Jackson got his first tooth at 5 months, so I have been waiting and waiting. Sam just turned 8 months last week. He is so different from Jackson, even tho they look so much alike, so I guess I shouldn't be surprised! He crawled earlier and pulled up on furniture earlier. I think he'll be walking within 6 weeks, which would be earlier than Jackson, too. He is smaller than Jack and not as heavy either, but he is so motivated to be wherever I am or his brother is. He hates to be alone and WILL NOT be left! He will play independently and is captivated (read: frozen in place) by his brother's educational TV shows for almost a whole 30 minute block, but he is such a people person that his favorite activity is to play and snuggle!! Snuggling is my favorite cuz Jack would never let me! He always wanted to go off and explore or wrestle with daddy. Sam is a mama's boy, even though his word was the indiscriminate "dada." (I thought it was "hi." He said that this week, but Ben reminded me that he said "dada" last weekend. Ben awakened me last Sat morning from a deep sleep. He had woken up with the boys and let me sleep in, so I was a little groggy when he came to tell me and I went right back to sleep, haha.) He has excellent balance and strength in his legs. Even the nurses at Dr. Chen's office commented at how hard he writhed when they held him down for his last set of shots. :(

Other news with Sam is that he has figured out how to bring food to his mouth AND how to hold his sippy cup (not always to where he can get a drink, but hey, one step at a time). This is nice because now instead of sitting and feeding him, I can break food into small pieces and he can eat it on his own. It takes him forever, and half of it ends up raked into his lap, but he likes it and it keeps him quietly occupied during naptime since his nap schedule is not the same as the preschoolers'. I am able to type my care sheets right next to where Sam eats so it is great!

Last week 3 of my kids had the flu, but somehow we all avoided it in my family and none of the other kids got it! YAY! All my sanitizing like crazy must have helped a little, I guess.

Ben is doing an OB/GYN rotation now and loves it. He hates the GYN part since he is at the county hospital and has seen some disgusting things, but he LOVES the OB part. He said that if he could JUST do OB, he would consider changing his planned specialty from ER, but unfortunately, they are kind of a package deal. HIs schdeule is a little tamer than what we were used to last semester, but the last few days were hard. He was on call three nights in a row and then came home and slept all day and went right back in. Then had one day off, worked all day today and left with his dad when he got home for a three-day weekend hunting trip. It's okay though. He needs a break, and I'm in an okay place for him to leave me with the boys all weekend. Besides, we have craft night planned and Sara is coming to stay with me, and I need to give Jackson more naked time (well, unless I decide to quit), so it is a good time to just hang at home.

I'm really starting to enjoy and appreciate my calling. Last Sunday I taught again, and it went really well. Every week I am more and more confident and comfortable getting up in front of a group of women to teach. So what now? Well, I guess the Lord feels that if I can handle that, then I might be able to handle an additional calling I'm not in YW, but I have been asked to be the girls camp leader for the ward. I know it will be a hard calling in the coming months, and I have to be gone from my boys for a week this summer, but I'm excited! I love camping and I loved girls camp and I think this is a calling I can serve in with enthusiasm. My mom has already agreed to come and stay with my boys for the week if for some reason Ben can't be with them. (We don't know his schedule for the summer yet.)

Well, I'm sure there is more, but that was a bit longer recap than I had planned when I sat down and I have much to do before I can go to bed, so more will just have to wait till next time!

Full

2010-01-19T20:10:00.000-08:00

My heart is full tonight, and I just need to say that I am so blessed!

Sometimes I am willing to take on more than I can handle and then just charge through it, stressed to the max, meltdowns here and there, but the Lord knows better than I do what I can handle, when I can handle it. I am learning more and more to trust in Him. I see that, in retrospect, what I want is not always what I need, and He doesn't let me take on more than I can handle, and even when I think I have taken on more than I can handle, He is there to aid me and comfort me. I am so grateful for his watchful care, and I feel His love in my daily life. I'm so grateful for the talents He has given me that enable me to support my family. I'm grateful to be be able to be home every day to watch my children grow and smile as I see them fit the pieces of life together in their own unique way. I'm grateful to be a positive influence in the lives of other children, a second mother sometimes, and at the same time do something I enjoy, no, something I LOVE!

And now, to top it all off, I get to feel good about the fact that people are choosing me! They are choosing me over centers, other child care homes, and even over themselves to care for their children. Bright Idea Learning Center is full, full, full for the next year and a half! I have reached max income until Ben graduates! No advertising, no tours, no financial stress...YAY! YAY! YAY!

Help!

2010-01-17T19:12:00.000-08:00

Now that it is a new year, our church time has changed from 8:30 to 11:00. Often I am readying the family solo as Ben has to be at the hospital some Sundays. It has been hard for me to get the boys up by myself and get us all fed, prepared for sacrament with diapers, wipes, changes of clothes (for Sam the spitter/puker), bottles, sippy cups, snacks, quiet toys, etc. and off to church on time. Many times I have even prepared everything the night before, but of course, as were walking out the door, someone would have a poopy diaper or I'd remember I had to grab one last thing. Our church attendance was not stellar. When we did attend, we were usually late and sat in the foyer.

When we switched times, I thought all that would improve. But it hasn't. And now we face new issues. Our attendance has been better, but for some reason, we are still late for church! And now, our nap schedule is all messed up. Sam still takes 2 naps a day: a 2 hour morning nap beginning at about 9:30 or 10:00 (depending on what time he woke up) and then an hour and half afternoon nap at around 3:00. I have tried to play with it, but he will not lay down a moment earlier and if he is late, his whole day is messed up.

Like today. Sam woke up at 7:30, so he was barely ready to go to sleep at 10 am. I got him dressed for church, then put him down, he fussed for about 10 minutes and was asleep by about 10:15. Well, we were running late for church anyway, so he got to sleep until about 11:15, but then I had to wake him up so we could leave. I thought I could get him to go back to sleep at church with a bottle and rocking him, but nope. He was good all through church, just very squirmy and he kept climbing all over me. I would have put him down to play with toys on the floor, except I couldn't get him to be quiet in any of the meetings today! He was so babbly and loud! Finally, in the last hour, during the closing prayer, he fell asleep. When it was time to go get Jackson from nursery, I put him in his carseat, but he woke up and never fell back asleep again. Not in the car, and not when we got home and I tried to put him down in his bed.

We got home from church at 2:20. By the time I got both boys fed, and put Jackson down for a nap, it was 2:45. Jackson slept until almost 6:00. (In retrospect, I should have woken him up early, but I was busy dealing with Sam the whole time he was asleep, so I didn't.) After I put Sam in his bed, I thought he'd cry it out, but after 20 minutes the screaming was escalating, so I went to get him. Three times that afternoon I had him asleep in my arms and three times he wouldn't transfer to his bed. He just wanted to snuggle with me all day and never did really take a nap. I put him to bed at 7:30 pm and he still fought sleep! (Oh yeah, and in all that struggle, he threw up on me twice. This kid has the worst gag reflex! A little phlegm and he barfs up his last meal. On me. Or the carpet. The recliner has taken the brunt twice! We are going to have to get new carpet and furniture before Sam's first birthday at this rate!)

So finally Sam was down and 8:30 hit and it was time for Jackson's bath. I wanted to let him stay up since I didn't think he was tired with such a long and late nap, but he was being so rotten throwing fits about this and that. ("I want candy! I want to watch CARS! I want juice RIGHT NOW! No, I don't want that. That is STUPID!" That last one was a first. Where did THAT come from??! My preschoolers don't even say that!) I thought maybe he was ready for bed, too. Ben had gotten home, had some dinner and went to bed. He got up at 4:45 am this morning and didn't get home until almost 7 pm. He was exhausted, but Jackson's fits during bathtime woke him up and he came in to see if I wanted some reinforcements. The stern Daddy voice calmed Jackson down and helped for a while, but after that it was just more fits. And I'm talking major kicking, screaming, possessed by the devil fits. The kind where time out doesn't work with Jackson. By the time I put him to bed, I had spanked him twice, he lost his privilege to read a bedtime book, and I had to forego saying prayer with him because I couldn't get him to stop screaming.

Truly, my kids have their moments, but today was especially horrendous! Does anyone else have this church schedule with little ones? What do you do?! Any secrets? Please share because if I don't get this figured out, we may become inactive at church! Help!

Did I mention my boys are growing too fast!?

2010-01-14T19:20:00.000-08:00

Today Sam started using the furniture/the nearest leg/the dog to pull himself up to standing. The first few times, he didn't have the best balance and fell almost immediately, but he was a persistent little guy and by bedtime, he was pulling himself up quite quickly and could hold himself up for as long as he wanted to be there.

Everyone is excited about this except Jackson. Not only can Sam follow him around the house, but now he practically climbs up in his lap. You should see Jack shield all his toys so Sam can't get them. When did Jack get so selfish? Hmmm...I guess potty-training isn't the only thing we will be working on.

On the potty-training note, it is still going very well. Today, for the first time, Jackson initiated a successful attempt! He goes potty every time we sit, but still we have some wet Pull-ups! He stops and starts his flow a lot when we sit, so how do I get him to make sure he gets it all out so he will have a dry Pull-up until our next trip?!

For those friends of mine who are also potty-training, one of my pre-k parents found a "potty watch" that goes off every 30 minutes or something and it plays a little potty song. Her little boy hears the song and toddles off to use the potty without question! I gotta find one of those!! That is the hardest part for me - to make sure I remember to take Jackson after he has had something to drink or on a regular basis, but I'm not stressing. We have all the time in the world to do this, and I figure as he gets more practice, he'll start to initiate it more and more and I won't have to be the one to remember all the time. We are learning how to do this together and I'm not going to force him or push him into anything before he is ready. Anyway, good luck to everyone!

Empowered

2010-01-12T19:33:00.000-08:00

3 miles in 26:30. Beat my time by a minute and a half. Felt good. Ran another mile, but I took it slow. total=4 miles in 36:30. Personal best time ever.

AND since I suffered from childhood asthma, it was also my personal best distance ever, even though I played Division I college soccer and had to run all the time. I could never run the long runs with my team without having an asthma attack. It feels so good to be able to breathe! I feel so strong!

For Sale...

2010-01-11T20:21:00.000-08:00

Does anyone want to buy a kids' train table or know someone who does? It is in great shape, just some scuffs, but it takes up a lot of room in my play room. I am going to replace it with a road rug to open up some space. I'll sell to the first responder for $30 bucks. I paid $50 for it on Craigslist 2 yrs ago.

Crawling and Potty-Training

2010-01-09T08:42:00.001-08:00

My boys are getting so big! 2 days before Christmas, Sam started crawling and now not only is he speedy fast and chases us wherever we go, but he can also pull himself up to his knees to get to things. He wants so much to pull all the way up to standing and if you hold his hands when he is on his knees, he'll try to get his legs out from under him to stand. When he stands, he gets so excited! He really has good balance already for standing, but he just can't figure out how to get his legs out from under him.

Jackson started walking at 10 months, but I bet that Samson beats that. He is just so determined not to be left out of anything and when he can't keep up with his brother or me, he gets so frustrated.

Jackson and I, meanwhile, have started the potty training porcess. He is not yet 2.5, but he has been showing the signs of being ready, so we started it. I figured he would be ready early because he sees all his friends using the "big boy" potty, and he thinks he is just as big as they all are. So far it is going very well. He is a little intimidated about sitting on the potty and sometimes needs some coaxing, but since Christmas, he has at least gone pee-pee in the big boy potty one or two times a day, everyday. He also gets very excited when he goes potty. He runs around the house exclaiming to everyone, "I went pee-pee in da big boy potty, Daddy/Mama! " Plus, I give him a small handful of flavored marshmallows and a pull-up to wear as a treat for a successful attempt, and he gets excited about that, too.

We are still not at the point where he tells me that he needs to go potty, I just take him in there at the designated potty time in our school day and sometimes after I know he has had something to drink. I really have no idea what I'm doing, but what I'm doing seems to be working so far. If you have any tips or things that have worked for you, please feel free to share.

Happy, Happy, Birthday Benjamin Dear

2010-01-07T19:55:00.000-08:00

Not to make everyone barf cuz I'm not usually one for public expressions of love (Why is that? I'm not even a hugger. It makes me uncomfortable. I used to have this relative who always wanted to kiss everyone on the lips and she was a smoker. Disgusting. Anyway...RANDOM), but I just gotta say that my husband is the best! I love him so much. Right now he is completely exhausted, passed out on the couch, and I just looked down at him, and he looks like a little boy who played too hard. Cute. And my boys look just like him. Lovin that.

Ben is 29 today (1.5 years my junior), so here are 29 things that I love about him..haha just kiddin that would be WAYYYY long. I could do it, but would anyone really read it? And if you didn't, it wouldn't really do him any justice, so how about since his birthday is the 7th, I will list 7 things.

1. He is SO fun! For Christmas my dad got a ping pong table. But the only place in my parents' house it could go is in the garage. However, my mom got her Christmas wish as well. My dad and brother cleaned out the garage enough so that she could park in it. And she can. If my dad is the one who parks it. AND it is literally touching things from the piles of who knows what they are keeping on the other side of the garage. Anyway, they put it on the back newly-extended and newly-covered and soon to be enclosed as a Florida room, patio. The problem is that is was FREEZING while we were home for almost 2 weeks at Christmas and no one wanted to go outside to play. Except Ben. He made us all bundle up in ski-wear and mismatched gloves and coats and silly hats and play "Polar Bear Ping Pong." None of the rest of us would have dared go out in the cold and snow, but Ben got out there every day and scraped the ice off the back patio so we could all play. And we laughed and had so much fun! Then there was the time on our cruise that we took a RHINO on the highway in Mexico to the tourist attraction Blowhole and to the sand dunes and Ben jumped off all these huges jumps and we got air and I about broke my collarbone on the seatbelt, but we still laugh about it!
2. He is such an awesome dad. Seriously, folks, they are working him to DEATH in med school, but he comes home and is so excited to see his boys. Jackson literally runs to him as soon as he comes home and they chase and wrestle and tickle and play video games and watch football and share snacks. They are best buds. He takes study breaks so he can occasionally give the boys a bath, read them a story, and participate in family prayer with us. He is always trying to find ways that he can share something fun he discovered in his childhood withour boys. He CANNOT wait until Jackson can go hunting with him (cough, cough, I can, though, cough, cough). But he isn't just the fun dad, he makes sure Jackson respects me, and reinforces our house rules and provides consequences if need be, too. If Jackson is disobedient, all fun ceases immediately until the problem is dealt with and resolved and then fun can resume. He is stern, but not harsh, and he always gives him a hug and says I love you when he is done dolign out the discipline. He is a great example to me, as I have a tendency to sometimes be "the nurturer" and can be too lenient at times.
3. He loves my family and they love him. Seriously, my mom dubbed him "Ben the Beloved" almost from day one. It is on his stocking even. He went skiing in Colorado with just my dad and brother and talked politics the whole way with my dad and played Xbox in the back of our Jeep with my brother. My sister asks his advice on her boyfriends and knows he will be straight with her and that he wants the best for her. He is one of the only people who can put emotions aside when it comes to her and just tell her how it is. I think if we split up, they'd keep Ben and my boys and throw me back. :)

4. He is so supportive of me. His daily grind is unbelievably stressful and insane, but he listens when I tell him I've had a hard day or that I am having a hard time, and he tries to be my knight in shining armor and fix it for me. Whatever I need to make things easier, he is willing to try it if it is feasible.

5. If he does something that annoys me, like leaving dishes in the living room and dirty clothes everywhere but the hamper, I can just tell him, and he is apologetic and really does try to be better about that instead of rolling his eyes, or calling me a nag or completely ignoring me. He hears me and truly wants to help my day be as easy as he can. (So I appreciate that and usually just pick it up and decide it isn't the hill I want to die on and that he has more important things on his mind than dishes and get over it.)

6. He works hard. Not just at school, but at whatever he is doing. If his working on a project at home, he doesn't settle for rigging it somehow. He will find out how to tackle it (if he doesn't already know how, which he usually does.) and get it done. He has built furniture for my preschool, fixed drains, put in shelving, built us a deck, assembled our play station, built a play loft in the preschool, installed ceiling fans, put in windowsills, etc. All on top of his busy work/school/study schedule. No wonder he is so exhausted right now. I know that Ben will do WHATEVER he has to do to make sure our family has everything we need. It is so comforting and relieving.

7. He is honest and trustworthy. Sometimes I may not want to hear what he has to say, but he will tell me truthfully if I ask him a question about any topic. I know I can count on him not to play games or sugar-coat it. I am a person who is motivated by that. I also know he goes where he says he goes and does what he says he is doing. He doesn't keep things from me. I trust him completely.

Well, I feel that I could keep going, but that is 7 and it is still long. I love you, Ben! Happy Birthday. Enjoy your 20's while they last! Next year I'm throwing you a huge, embarrassing Graduation/30th Birthday party!!!

New Years Resolution

2010-01-05T19:20:00.000-08:00

Among many, one of my NY goals is to pick up running again and achieve the goal I set for myself last year: to be able to run 3 miles in 25 minutes. Today was my first run. I ran 3 miles in 28 minutes, but I stopped and stretched between each mile for 3 minutes. I felt good and maybe could have run another mile, but my hands were freezing since it is 34 degrees right now! Next time I might wear gloves?

only 1.5 yrs of med school, and then what?

2010-01-05T11:55:00.000-08:00

Ben has decided that he wants to be an Emergency Medicine Dr. He thinks he wants to do a fellowship in Pediatric ER Medicine, but that depends on how long the fellowship will be. It varies depending on the residency program he gets into. Some programs have a one year fellowship and some have up to a 3 year program.

He has decided that his top 5 choices are: #1 the MD residency in Tulsa, #2 the MD residency here in Fort Worth at JPS hospital, #3 the DO program in Tulsa, #4 the (MD?DO?) residency in Joplin, MO, #5 the (MD/DO?) residency in Oklahoma City. I can't remember, but I think he said that there is supposed to be a 75% chance that he will match with one of his top 5 choices, but just in case he doesn't, he has to declare 10 choices. He hasn't gotten that far yet.

Although Ben will graduate as a DO, he would rather be in an MD program than a DO program because typically the MD programs aren't as many years, the salary is higher, and they get more paid days off. Also some DO programs require you to do studies and write papers and stuff that Ben doesn't want to have to do anymore. (Can you blame him? Poor guy has been in school almost 25 years!)

Here's where it gets complicated. Forgive me if I butcher this, but it is very confusing and I don't have a perfect understanding of it in the first place. We are still new to all of this procedure!

The potential residents and the programs are all entered into a match system, much like the system Ben entered into when he was interviewing for med schools. There are MD programs and DO programs, but the DOs make you declare ahead of time if you want one of their programs. Doing so means you automatically match with that school if they pick you, and you don't get to see if you could have matched with an MD program later. Since Ben doesn't want a DO program if he can help it, (his top 2 picks are MD) we have decided NOT to declare a DO program and take a gamble in hopes that we will get to go to Tulsa or stay here in Fort Worth in a MD program. If we don't get one of those picks, it may be too late for us to match with one of his DO picks because they may already be taken by people who DID declare DO. If this happens, we really don't know where we might end up. It is called a Scramble. Ben said most likely we would end up in some place like Michigan because no one wants to go there. (YYYYUUUUCCCKKKK!!)

So...that's where we are at in this crazy med school process. My first hope is that he matches with one of the top 2 because I really want to go home while he is in his residency since we'll never see him. I'll get to be close to both our families if I ever need anything, and he will only have a 3 year residency for basic ER Medicine and then he is DONE (unless he does the Pediatric fellowship)! OR if we stay here in Fort Worth, that would be okay, too. We are settled here, we have an established business here, we have friends here and some family that can help us if we need anything, we won't have to move, and we can build equity on our house. I love our house, and we have plenty of room to grow into it, and lots that I want to do to it still, so that is okay with me.

If we don't get one of the top 2, then obviously choice 3 (DO-Tulsa) would be great for me, but not so great for Ben (an extra year, less salary, etc..) and choice 4 or 5 wouldn't be a bad alternative. Yes, we'd be starting over, but we'd be very close to Tulsa. Joplin is 1.5 hours away and OKC is about 2 hours away and there is a temple there, too. (The one we married in, actually.)

I PRAY, PRAY, PRAY that we don't have to go anywhere else, especially not to Michigan. I don't want to have to start all over, and I certainly don't want to start all over somewhere where I'd basically be a single mom AND my family is nowhere near me, especially since we'll probably be having another baby that first year of Ben's residency, and I may still have to do the preschool if Ben's salary isn't enough for us to live on.

And that's what we know so far. Next year Ben will be doing elective rotations so he may be spending a lot of time in those places and I'll be a single mom, running the preschool and I already have full enrollment for the 10-11 school year. Sounds like a lot, huh? Keep us in your prayers, please. I may have a nervous breakdown before it is all over.

The Duchess

2010-01-02T23:25:00.001-08:00

I just watched this movie with Keira Knightly. It got me thinking about the advancements in women's rights that we so enjoy today. Back then, men could divorce a woman leaving her with no rights to her children. Today when a marriage fails (or prior to marriage), most often women are abandoned by men to care for their children alone. Food for thought. Watch the movie and you'll see what I mean. It made me angry and depressed, but it was a good story.

Samson's 7th Month

2009-12-14T12:45:00.000-08:00

He creeps... and gets embarrassed when you praise him for it.

He loves the dog...

...especially sneak attacking her. Bathtime with brother is fun!
He can sit up, but the bathtub is slippery, so Mama holds him always.

and he seems to know what a gift he has been to our family!

Thanksgiving in Galveston

2009-12-08T18:36:00.000-08:00

We have missed going to Galveston the past 2 years. Last year Hurricane Ike hit earlier in the year and Galveston was still cleaning up the aftermath when Thanksgiving rolled around so our family decided not to make the trip and stayed in the Plano area instead.

This house was just a few houses down from our main house in the neighborhood. As you can see, it didn't fare too well in Hurricane Ike. I guess the owners decided not to fix it back up so it sits like this. You can't really tell from the picture, but there are still furniture and window treatments hanging in there. It looks so odd sitting next to all the pretty, freshly painted beach houses.

The year before that my aunt Ginger had JUST had a baby and my grandmother was in Arizona with her helping her recover, But the 2 or 3 years before that, we had been renting a fully stocked beach house on Galveston Island for Thanksgiving and the WHOLE family came out to be together for Thanksgiving. When I say whole family and "we had been renting," I mean that my grandparents rented a huge beach house for their five children & spouses, their 10 grandchildren, some with spouses and some without, and their 6 great-grandchildren.

My sister, Meg, with her youngest daughter, Ella,

one of the 4 grandchildren born in the last 2 years. We have taken historical tours of Galveston, shopped The Strand, tried out several notable sea food places, and enjoyed the beach and the ocean (for those crazies who still want to swim in cold water!!).

My brother, Conor, AKA, one of the "crazies" (age 15 - that could explain it...) It is SOO fun to be surrounded by so much family and to be in such a relaxing environment. However, we were a little crowded this year with the influx of great-grandchildren in 2 years (4 out of 6 were born in that 2 year period, not to mention a grandchild, too!) This year was the first year we had to expand to 2 beach houses!

The Kiddie Table for the Thanksgiving meal - two great and a grandchild (Jackson, Meg's oldest - Addy and Sophie is Ginger's middle child)

This is the first house we have rented every year.

This is the house we expanded to this year. My litttle family stayed in this house this time. It was nice because this one was right on the beach! The other house is just a few houses down across the neighborhood street that runs parallel to the beachline.
Ben and Jackson, enjoying the beach scene and looking for seagulls to feed. The added bonus to the trip was that Ben was given off Thursday through Sunday so we got 4 uninterrupted days with him. He didn't have to be on call for Thanksgiving with the rest of his team and enjoyed a nice stress free vacation and I got a break, too! Plus, Jackson got lots of quality daddy time on the beach making castles and feeding hte birds and they even got in the water (for five minutes, lol, and then raced upstairs to get in the warm jacuzzi garden tub!)

Grandmollie, my mom, got to enjoy a little down time with all 4 of her grandkids.

Too bad they weren't all being cheerful about sitting on her lap and having a picture taken.

October 2009

2009-12-08T11:37:00.001-08:00

A little belated, but better late than never.

Superhero boys in costume!! Jackson ran around making spider web shooter noises. He was sooo excited to be Spiderman! I wanted to get him a super cute costume online, but when I saw how excited he was to be Spiderman, we just went ahead and got the cheap-o Wal-mart one. He didn't care. He loved it! Lesson learned.

And some yummy yet scary treats... Eyeball Ice creamand white chocolate marshmallow ghosts

And we played some Halloween relay games, but somehow I'm the one who ended up wrapped up like a mummy. See how scary I am?! :)

It's That Time Again...

2009-11-30T11:46:00.000-08:00

The week of December 14-18 I will be doing my annual Christmas Around the World unit. I am looking for 4 volunteers to present countries. I will provide volunteers with a lesson plan for a country and a craft idea. Volunteers will be responsbible for presenting the country to the group and leading the craft with me as the assistant. This is so that the "travel experience" feels authentic instead of me just leading group time as normal.

As a volunteer, your children are welcome to participate for the week, "traveling" to each new country with a "passport" on the "Polar Express." On Friday, we will wear our PJ's, watch the Polar Express, have P.E. themed treats, and have a $5 book exchange.

Please let me know asap if you are interested in helping so I can assign countries and get you the prep work.

House of Night series part 2

2009-11-17T11:34:00.000-08:00

I started reading the second book, and while it is good, there are definitely some parts I have to skip. She gets a little sexual in content. It is definitely not as tame as Twilight, just wanted to warn you in case you were considering the book.

Looking for a good book?

2009-11-14T13:24:00.000-08:00

I just started the House of Night series. The author is PC Cast (and her daughter Kristin). The name I knew her as was Ms. Bond, and she was my Creative Writing teacher at Broken Arrow's South Intermediate High School. (Also where my mother taught Intro to Law for about 20 years)

I just finished the first book, Marked, and I was hooked. It is a good book, targeted to young adults, much like Twilight. It is very much a mix between Harry Potter and Twilight, with the main character being sent off to Vampyre Finishing School after being marked with the vampyre symbol of a crescent moon on her forehead. She is deemed special because her crescent moon is filled in instead of just an outline like vampyre fledglings usually are.

The book is darker than Twilight and, at times, unnecessarily crass in my opinion, but the story is good. I was hooked and just bought the next 2 books in the series.

This was my first experience reading a book that was authored by someone I know. It is surreal to read a book that is set in my hometown, specifically in my high school, with teachers referenced that I actually had in high school. It is also strange that I can hear Bond's "voice" on every page. I can hear her sarcasm and disdain for men. I can hear her "what teens should and shouldn't do" speeches that I remember her going off about in class. She was that teacher who thought she was so in touch with us, but really she was only in touch with the popular kids. The rest of us, she didn't have a clue about. To be honest, she wasn't my favorite teacher, and actually laughed at some of the things I wrote as she was reading them (anonymously) to the class. I loved writing in my youth and she killed it a little for me.

That being said, she is a talented authoress herself and the series is good so far. I think she has excellent timing because right now the in thing is all things Twilight and vampyre-related so she'll get a lot of fans who are looking to capture the Twilight moment all over again. I wouldn't be surprised if we see these books out in movies soon, too. Well done, Bond!

Snapshots of our day

2009-11-04T11:59:00.000-08:00

On the swings, during outside playtime this morning I heard:

Jackson (already on a swing, with me pushing him): Hi, L. Howa yeeew?

L (joining him on the swings): I'm good, Jackson. How are you?

Jackson: Ummm, I good. I had bites today.

I just laughed because that was so random. As if I don't feed my child every day, hah!
**************************************************************************
Later Jackson was sitting in a chair and wanted K to come sit with him, so he kept hollering, "K!!!! Come sit wiff me!" She obliged, happily (she is an only child and loves Jackson like a brother) and when she got up several minutes later, S. came to sit with him and he kept pushing her off the seat because he wanted K. (or trying to, but I kept scolding him, telling him that wasn't nice and that S. could sit there, too.)
**********************************************************************************
This morning I had Sam on a blanket in the living room playing with some old toys that used to be Jackson's. He doesn't really remember them, but he thinks they are new toys so he is always all over Sam trying to take them away and play with them. I have let him play with them a few times so he would get it out of his system and not be curious, but today I had to keep an eye on the other kids playing in the playroom and so I closed the gate so Jackson couldn't get in there where I couldn't see him. He got so mad at me that when I was over in the art center helping L and S get out the paint, he came up behind me and slapped my back very hard. I whirled around and said, "Did you just hit me?" in my loud, "Oh, I don't think so" mom voice, and I put him in time out, all the while explaining that I was sorry that he was angry with me, but hitting is not a good choice. We don't hit our friends and we do not hit our moms. Hitting is not okay. So he was, of course, throwing a huge temper tantrum and trying to scoot himself out of time out when I was not looking. I kept telling him, "You sit there! You may NOT get up. You are not making good choices and you need to think about NOT hitting Mama."

After he was able to get up, we hugged and apologized to each other and talked more about how hitting was not nice, he went to play with "da guys" (action figures). I watched him put 2 action figures in time out and say, "No, no, guys, you don't get up! We don't hit! That is not a good choice! You think about it! You sit there!" haha, poor guy is the youngest one (except Sam) and I guess he needs to feel like he is the boss of SOMEONE. ;)

Happy Halloween

2009-11-02T12:14:00.000-08:00

We went to Tulsa because Ben's mom invited us to a Halloween party for the grandkids. We didn't leave till Sat morning and get back home Sunday at 7ish, so it was a whirlwind trip. Although we had a great time, I am less and less motivated to travel with kids. It was a borderline nightmare. Sam got off his perfect schedule where he was sleeping 10-11 hours a night at the perfect times for me. Jackson hardly napped at all in the car so he was pretty cranky. I swear all our realtives are going to think our kids are brats!! On Sat night, we spent the night with Nana & Papa (Ben's mom & dad) and Sam WOULD NOT sleep. Ben and I traded off being up with him until 3:30 when he finally fell asleep (until 7:30 am). I guess he just didn't want to sleep in a strange crib! We tried everything. I even put him in the car and drove aroudn Owasso for ten minutes until he fell asleep, but 20 minutes after getting him home, he woke back up. That was hard to deal with because he is normally sucha happy baby and a great sleeper! He lays down and doesn't even cry, just goes right to sleep usually.

Anyway, we did have a good time, but it was a short trip and our kids were rotten! Here are a few pics of us trick-or-treating with family.

Letter to the Editor- part 2

2009-10-29T12:33:00.002-07:00

Yesterday in my anger I left a message on the library answering machine about my frustrating experience and left my phone number in case someone would like to call me back. I was polite in my message, but it was obvious that I was very upset. Today the manager (?) called me back and basically said she was sorry for my experience. However, she said, the librarians are tired at the end of the day and ready to go home, they had already turned off the computer system and so they couldn't have helped me anyway and their clocks are set differently than other people's watches and that their employees get frustrated when people wait until the last minute to come to the library.

What?! Excuse me?! That is your response?! You have got to be kidding me!

I politely but curtly said that my car clock is set to local time and temperature, and perhaps they might want to consider making sure their clocks are set to that as well to avoid future discrepancies regarding accurate time. She assured me they had done so already this morning after my call.

To her pointed comment about people waiting until the last minute, I was seething, but responded that I do not close my preschool until 5:30 and that my husband was not at home so I had to bring both my boys under the age of 2 with me. It took me a few minutes to get out the door, a few minutes to get to the library, and a few minutes to get them both out of the car, but that I was at the door at 5:53 and was unable to be served. I had not intended to wait until the last minute. In fact, I had actually tried to get the books the night before, but was unable to make it until 7:45 the previous night (on Tues and Thurs they close at 8) and a librarian was standing guard at the front door, shooing people out and not allowing new patrons inside, so I didn't bother to get out of the car since that night I had not requested the books yet and I would have had to search for them myself.

Her attitude was that of making an obligatory phone call, but not caring much about my experience. She was in a hurry to get "call disgruntled library patron" checked off her to do list for the day as she rushed me off the phone and talked over me when I replied to her comments. Her apology was insincere and her reasons for her employees' actions were weak. I'm all the more irritated and fired up to write a letter, but based on the comments I received on my last blog post, I'm thinking I need to take time to get my facts straight first, and possibly find out who the chain of command is and who to write to (if I decide to do that) before I publicly attack the library. I feel validated knowing that so many people share my concerns and frustrations, so thank you for that!

GGGRRRRRRR!!!!!

Letter to the Editor

2009-10-28T19:17:00.000-07:00

I'm thinking of writing an angry letter to the Editor of the Saginaw newspaper. I'm very frustrated with the services our local library offers and with the grumpy service they provide. I am a good teacher, using the library services for the benefit of the community, promoting literacy even. Here is a list of my grievances. Am I being unreasonable?

-Though I live a stone's throw (literally) from the city of Saginaw limits (in Fort Worth) and within about 3 miles of the library, I have to pay a yearly non-residents' fee to use the city of Saginaw library. The closest Ft Worth library to me is over 10 miles and through heavy traffic.
-You can only borrow DVDs for a day and the late fines are ridiculous!
-You can only check out 5 hardback books, but all the children's books are hardback, so if you are a teacher, tough luck, you only get 5.
-They are closed on Mondays!!
-The summer reading program for kids was weak.
-They do not have a computer system in place that allows for requesting books to be held, I have to call every time.
-When they say their hours are until 6:00, that really means 5:50. I showed up tonight at 5:53 to pick up books that were already at the counter on hold for me, and the doors were locked. A worker looked right at me and ignored me. There I was at the door with my 2 kids under the age of 2, needing those books for my lesson tomorrow, and nope, can't get in.
-They say they will pull books and hold them for you if you request it, but when you do request it, they think of every reason in the book not to be able to do it. "We're too busy today." "We're shorthanded." I understand telling me that every once in a while, but I have gotten this response at least 7 times. Fine, just fine, I'll let my 2 year old run rampant in the library since I am usually a single mom and have him (and Sam) with me - which is why I can't go find my own books -then the crotchety old library ladies can reshelve all the books he pulls off the shelf!!

I know there are more reasons I am angry, but I can't think of any right now and I need to go do laundry. Should I write the letter?

What is wrong with me?!

2009-10-27T20:35:00.001-07:00

I must be hormonal or something! Lately, I have been either super depressed for no real reason, embarrassed over something trivial, very angry about something only one step up from trivial, and then really happy and empowered. I think it is a combination of factors:

1. I'm LONELY!! Ben is always gone and I'm bored and I love my children and my home, but I am ready to get away from both for a while!! Plus, I have no one to talk to. I'm around kids all day and get very little adult interaction!!

2. I'm frustrated with the weight loss plateau I'm on. Okay, well, that isn't exactly true; I am losing, but it is taking FOREVER!!! I hate feeling so pudgy and out of shape! I hate that most of my jeans make me look like a streetwalker when I try to get into them, so I don't and just look fat in other pants. Dresses are good, I should just wear dresses...

3. I found out about something not-so-good that had been going on that I didn't know about, and it is partly my fault becuse I had failed to take care of something and partly my fault for being so naive and trusting. Now I am embarrassed that I was so blind. I feel really stupid, even though it really isn't that big of a deal.

4. I'm stressed about handling so many responsibilities on my own all the time! AND worried that I may not be balancing them all very well.

5. Happy and empowered - well, that is because I was at the gym running myself skinny on the elliptical and I was jamming to a song I liked on my MP3 and feeling strong and confident.

Hmmm...I should live at the gym.

Mmm...Fall Dinners

2009-10-25T14:27:00.000-07:00

One of the best things about Fall is the food! Here is one of our family's favorites. We had it for dinner tonight - "Charleston's" Baked Potato Soup & "Red Lobster" Cheesy Biscuits!

Baked Potato Soup
1 1/2 cans of chicken broth
1/2 cup of water
1 TBSP minced onion
5 TBSP butter, melted
5 TBSP flour
1/2 tsp salt
2 cups half and half
1/8 tsp oregano
4 cups cubed potatoes with or without skin
1/2 tsp pepper
1/8 tsp parsley
In a large pan, mix broth, water, oregano and parsley. Bring to a boil then simmer 5 minutes and add melted butter. Stir in flour slowly. Add salt and pepper. Add half and half.

Cook until bubbly. Add potatoes. Cook until done over low to medium heat, and stir occasionally. If you cook too fast, the soup will burn before the potatoes are done. Garnish with chopped onion, crisp cooked bacon and grated cheese.

Cheesy Biscuits
2 cups Bisquick
3/4 cup buttermilk (or the milk/vinegar substitute, but it isn't as good)
1 cup shredded cheddar cheese
2 TBSP of butter
1/4 tsp garlic powder (I prefer using garlic salt because the powder flavor is too strong for me)
1/4 tsp dried parsley, crushed fine

Preheat oven to 400 degrees. Combine Bisquick, milk, and cheese in a medium bowl. Mix by hand until well combined. Divide the dough into 12 equal portions (about 3 TBSP each) and spoon onto a lightly greased or nonstick cookie sheet. Flatten each biscuit a bit with your fingers.

Bake for 18-20 min or until the tops of the biscuits begin to brown. In a small bowl, combine the butter with the garlic powder. Heat this mixture for 30 seconds in the microwave, then brush a light coating over the top of each biscuit immediately after removing them from the oven. Sprinkle a dash of parsley over the top of each biscuit.

Great for eating while cheering on your favorite football team! ENJOY!! ;)

Fall Run-Down

2009-10-25T10:34:00.000-07:00

Jackson and Samson at the pumpkin patch a few weeks ago.

Here is a brief run-down of what is going on/coming up for the Blake family!

In true Fall spirit, we have recently visited both a Flower Mound Pumpkin Patch and Boo at the Zoo. Then last night we went to our ward's Trunk or Treat. We got there late because we were coming from a baby shower for a good friend, but Jackson was excited to once again don his Spiderman costume and say "Twicka Tweet!!" When we came home from the zoo, he kept requesting his candy bucket, saying, "I want my Twicka Tweet, Mama!" Unfortunately I have yet to capture the boys in their Halloween costumes, but Jackson is Spiderman and Samson is Superman. I wanted to get him a costume that was a little more unique, but he was SOOOO excited to be Spiderman, and after all it is HIS Halloween experience, not mine, so I relented. We did see about 10 other Spidermen at Boo at the Zoo though. Jackson was the cutest though, but of course, I am biased, haha.

Ben finished up his Internal Medicine rotation which was an extremely hard rotation for us. He starts Surgery on Monday which he is both excited for and nervous about. He is afraid he is going to love surgery and want to go into that field, but he doesn't want to love it because a surgeon's work schedule is not conducive to a lot of family time. He starts out in Orthopedic Surgery, then he does Vascular Surgery, then finishes up in General Surgery right before Christmas Break. He gets 2 weeks off for Christmas, but I doubt he gets any time off for Thanksgiving, so it looks like the boys and I will be venturing off to Galveston alone this year. Good thing there will be plenty of family around to help me! It is always hard to spend time in a house not baby (or toddler) friendly. The amount of things I will have to pack to salvage some semblance of a vacation for me endangers the level of space we will have in the Jeep!

Samson turned 5 months last Thursday. He is very close to being able to sit up on his own now. He can hold himself up, but he leans too far forward and gets angry because he isn't quite strong enough to sit himself back up straight. I also moved his bath location to the tub now, and I just lay him down in a very low level of water. Like Jackson did, he enjoys being surrounded by the water and having his legs free to kick and explore it.

Samson can also roll over both ways and scoot himself around a little on his blanket to get the toys he wants. He can't really crawl, but he finds a way to get what he wants. The other day I started group time with Samson in the living room on his tummy playing with some toys. We started group time and our songs, and he began to protest from the other room that we were having fun without him. By the time I got back in there to check on him a few minutes later he had somehow managed to position himself facing the doorway to the playroom several feet away from the blanket. It was as if he had decided that if I wasn't going to come get him despite his vehement demands, he was going to find a way to get in there himself! (He really likes to sit in the doorway to the playroom in his Exersaucer and watch the kids play, but lately, I have been trying to keep him separate from them as much as possible since we have had swine flu and strep throat going around.)

Prankster

2009-10-21T19:45:00.000-07:00

Jackson, age 26 mos, on his "BI-sikko"

This blog is for the sole purpose of documenting this funny story since I am so bad about keeping up with baby booking or scrapbooking.

Last night we were watching Monsters vs. Aliens in the living room as a family. Jackson was cuddled up with me on the couch. ("I wanna lay down too-oo!") Suddenly, he turned to me and animatedly said, "Mama, I wanna show you sumtin! C'mere Mama, I wanna SHOOOW you sumtin!" With that he got up and ran into the playroom, looking behind him to make sure I was following. It was so cute that I had to get up and follow him and see what he was so excited to show me all of a sudden.

He ran all the way through the living room, into the playroom and to the other side of the playroom near the train table. I followed him, and as soon as I got to the train table, I said, "Okay, buddy, what do you want to show me?" He stood there for a second, giggled, and took off running past me, clambered up on the couch and laid down in my comfy spot!! Laughing heartily, he said, "MY BLANKY!" and covered himself in my blanket.

AAAHH! Outsmarted by my own 2-year old, hahahaha! Lil stinker stole my spot!! He had to have planned the whole thing out! There we were sitting on the couch and he must have thought, hmmm, this spot is nice and warm, but I sure would have more room to stretch out if I can get my Mama off the couch! How can I accomplish that? hahahahaha

**WARNING** The following section is a bragging zone! Blatant bragging will follow. :)

Here are a few things Jackson can do now:

1. Q: What is your name? A: My namis Jasson. Q: Jackson Garit Blake? A: No, my namis JASSON!

2. Q: How old are you, Jackson? A: I'm ("I") 2.

3. Q: Can you spell your name? A: J-A-C-K-S-O-N (sing-song)

4. Q: Whats your phone number? A: 817-238-**** (not gonna put my phone number on here, but it is cute because he says the sevens like "sebben".

5. The other day, I was in "trouble," and he told me to go to time out and started counting. When I count, I usually give him till 5 and then he gets a spanking, but Jackson kept counting unitl he hit 36. haha, I guess he is a more lenient disciplinarian than I am.

6. Tonight he brought all the kids center stars to the living room table. He was counting them (there were 5) and he picked one up, looked at it for a minute, and said, "Iss S's star (he actually said her name, but I don't want to name her here). That peaked my curiosity so I asked to find V's star. He looked at all the stars, picked the correct star, and said, "Right dare, iss V's star." We repeated this until he correctly recognized all the kids' stars!

7. He is able to do a lot of the work with letters that my preschoolers do, including cutting and pasting, although I only let him use scissors when I am right there to help him. (I don't let any of the kids use scissors unless I am at the table, too.)

8. I catch him "reading" all the time. One of his favs is "It Looked Like Spilt Milk." I'll catch him "reading" it to himself (recalling, really). "Sometimes it looked like an angel. But it wasn't an angel."

Weight loss goals

2009-10-20T11:23:00.001-07:00

11 days ago I got into my favorite jeans again. Gotta keep going cuz there are many more pairs of jeans I am eager to get into.

At my last weigh in, I was 1.5 lbs away from my end of October goal! My total loss in pds since giving birth to Samson= 27.5 lbs!! I have to lose that last 1.5 lbs or I'm going to do something drastic!! It is getting tough to drag myself to the gym in the evenings because I'm not getting much sleep lately. Sam is teething and waking up multiple times in the night, then Jackson has been waking up early!! So I go to bed late, wake up several times, then get up early! After I close at 5:30, I make dinner, we eat, and by the time I'm ready to go anywhere it is 7:00 and I'm exhausted and the boys ideally need to get in the bath and start getting ready for bed at 7:45 (notice I said ideally, because that is SOOO not happening lately).

I only went to the gym twice last week, and I haven't been yet this week. I hope to go tonight but I have a few errands I HAVE to run, so I don't know if I'll have time.

My next goal is going to be to lose another ten lbs and be in the NEXT weight class AND to lose this stubborn belly fat, so focusing more on my abs than I have been. I'm giving myself until the end of the holiday season - January 31st because let's face it, I'm SO going to eat a bunch of junk and with all the travel, I may not get to stay on a workout schedule. If I can't lose 10 lbs in 3 months...well, I just will, that is all there is to it!! ;)

Looking for Ideas?

2009-10-16T11:14:00.000-07:00

Here are some things we have been doing in my preschool this week in our pumpkins and apples unit. I thought I'd share in case anyone is looking for a seasonal learning activity to do at home with your kids...

Color words - On Monday in group I wrote out my "Monday Morning Message" while the kids watched me. "Dear friends, Apples are red, yellow or green. Pumpkins are orange. Love, Mrs. Colleen" Then I asked them if they could help me find the color words in the message. I let a child find the word red (giving clues like it starts with a letter that says "rrr"), then the word green, then the word yellow, then word orange.

Arts and crafts - papier mache apples (balled up newspaper with papier mache (flour and water mixture) soaked paper towels, let dry for several days then paint desired color and hot glue a piece of stick on top for a stem. Warning - very messy!!), "stained glass" pumpkins (I drew out a pumpkin shape and cut out the middle so it was just an orange outline of a pumpkin. Then I cut a piece of clear contact paper to match my pumpkin shape and stuck it to the pumpkin outline. Kids stuck orange squares of tissue paper to the sticky contact paper and then I stuck them to the window for a Halloween decoration. This was easy - even Jackson could do this without assistance.)

Peter, Peter, Pumpkin Eater - We discussed the rhyme, found the rhyming words (and played a rhyme game where I said a word and they had to make up a real word or a silly word that rhymes with my word.) then we found all the letter P words int he rhyme, sang our letter P song, acted out the rhyme with flannel board pieces. We talked about rhythm and how nursery rhymes and poems have rhythm, then we slapped our knees to a beat and read the rhyme to the beat. Later we did a story sequencing activity with the rhyme.

Using our 5 Senses and Prior Knowledge to Compare Apples and Pumpkins: What color is the apple? What color is the pumpkin? How do apples grow? (trees) How do pumpkins grow? (vine) Which is heavier? What does the apple smell like? What does the pumpkin feel like? What does the outside of the pumpkin feel like? What does the outside of the apple feel like? We opened up the pumpkin and the apple. What do the insides of the apple and pumpkin feel like? Are they the same? How are they different? Make a prediction: Which will have more seeds, the apple or the pumpkin? We scooped out all the seeds and put them in groups of ten. Then we counted by 10's to find out how many seeds were in our pumpkin. They got bored after we got to 270 seeds and so we quit counting. :)

Decorating mini pumpkins - Mummy - you can use sterile gauze or cheesecloth. I used sterile gauze because it was easier to find, but I cut it to be half the width. We wrapped it around the pumpkin and used to glue to keep it in place and added googly eyes. Spider - we painted the pumpkin with black acrylic paint and let it dry during naptime, then added black pipe cleaner legs and multiple googly eyes.

Next week when we learn about Spiders and Bats, we will use our cute spider as a story starter during group time when we make up our own story about a spider. We will also do various activities with the Anansi the Spider legends, The Very Busy Spider book by Eric Carle, the nursery rhyme Little Miss Muffet, and the song The Itsy Bitsy Spider. We will also learn the difference between fiction and non-fiction by reading several non-fiction books about bats and spiders to compile facts about each, then reading fiction books and discussing how the books were different. We will write our spider facts on a large newspaper stuffed spider and then display the spider in a fake web in the corner of the playroom. We will write our bat facts on a large newspaper stuffed bat and hang it from the playroom ceiling. We will also continue to focus on color words (black, brown) and the letters S and B, and the number 8. Our arts and crafts will be turning a black tagboard number 8 into a spider with 8 pipecleaner legs and 8 googly eyes.

Hypothetical

2009-10-15T11:38:00.000-07:00

What do you do when a person you love is in a tough spot and needs help? They spiral downward and downward and know what to do to get themselves back on track, but won't. You can't say anything because they already know what to do, but for some reason they don't have the faith they need to believe that it WILL work. They are looking for a way to make it work all by themselves, and they don't want to hear that from you of all people. They just get more and more frustrated and sink lower and lower and things get harder and harder. You get to the point where you don't know how to help them, support them anymore. They have to figure it out on their own, but you are afraid they'll hit rock bottom before that happens, and THAT is just no good for anyone involved. So do you say something in the interest of all parties who will be affected or do you let them keep sinking, dragging everyone else down with them? Right now my plan is to pray, earnestly and continuously. Hey, it worked for me, maybe my prayers can work miracles, too.

My Daydream Before Sleep

2009-10-11T21:36:00.000-07:00

Tonight I was trying to go to sleep and my mind wandered and I had to write it down or I'd forget.

I was walking on a path. I knew it wasn't the right path for my destination, but I didn't care. I chose the path, but I suspected it was taking me away from where I was supposed to go. I stayed on it. I knew there was another path, a better path that was for sure going to take me where I was supposed to go, but I wasn't sure how to get to it and I knew it would be difficult if I tried to. I decided not to try. I kept walking on the path I had chosen, but the way became wet and muddy. My feet stuck in the mud with every step, but I kept walking. It got dark and I couldn't see far ahead of me anymore, but still I kept walking. Then, when it became most difficult for me to continue walking, I fell into a dark, muddy hole. I was stuck. I couldn't get out by myself. The hole was too deep.

Being stubborn as I am, I was determined to climb myself out. I tried several ways to get out, but all of them failed. Suddenly I felt very alone and the enormity of the situation became unbearable and for a moment, I gave up. Then I heard a voice above me telling me how to get out. I wasn't alone after all! I had to make an effort to follow the directions I was being given, and a few times I slid back into the hole a little, but I kept trying. The voice stayed with me, encouraging me, and I kept following the directions until I was most of the way out of the hole and then a hand reached out and helped me the rest of the way up. The voice had saved me!

He helped me find the right path, the path I should have chosen in the first place, and he stayed with me. It got light again and this path was easier to walk upon. I wasn't alone on this path. People I loved walked with me, and as long as I stayed on this path, my Savior never left me. He was always right there walking beside me, giving me directions to my destination.

I never wanted to leave my path again because I knew that other path was out there, and if I didn't follow directions, I might accidentally stumble upon it again and become lost or even fall back into the hole. On this path I was safe.

Ready for Fall

2009-10-11T14:07:00.001-07:00

This weekend's weather made me finally realize it is Fall.

I put my Fall wreath on the front door.

I changed my blog background from a summery one to a Fall one.

I made pumpkin bread and pumpkin cookies.

I pulled warm weather and too small (or too big in my case...YIPPEE!) clothes out of our closets and then bought some Fall clothes for the boys and for me.

Then today I made chicken and dumplings (a family fav - recipe below) to welcome Ben home from a 30 hour shift and warm us up while we watch the Cowboys game.

I'm ready!! Bring on the FALL!!

Easy Chicken and Dumplings

Ingredients:
whole fryer chicken (without neck and giblets)
4-5 medium potatoes - peeled and chopped into medium chunks
Cheap Refrigerated Biscuits
Salt/Pepper
Garlic Salt
Flour
Milk

In a pot filled with enough water to cover the chicken, boil on medium-high heat a whole fryer chicken (without neck and giblets) for about an hour to an hour and 1/2. Pull the chicken out to cool.

Dump 4 cups of chopped potato in boiling chicken broth. Boil the potatoes until softened (but not mushy) about 15-20 min. While potatoes are boiling, debone chicken and cut into chunks or shred. Salt and pepper the chicken pieces and add to the pot with softened potatoes and broth. Spread out biscuits on a cutting board and roll them out. Run a knife over flattened biscuits to slice into chunks for dumplings. Add dumplings one-by-one to boiling broth mix.

In a glass jar with a lid, add 1/3 c of milk, 1/3 c of flour, salt and pepper. Close lid and shake vigorously. Add to broth mix to thicken.

Note: You should add the chicken, biscuits and flour mixture in quick succession or the potatoes get too soft.

Should serve about 6-8 people.

Guilty

2009-10-10T17:35:00.001-07:00

Sorry I have bombarded blogger with entries in the last few days, but Ben is on call again, so my house is quiet and I have many thoughts.

Today I am watching more DVR'd conference and I just finished Elder Dallin H. Oaks talk which made some comparisons between our relationship with the Lord and a parent's relationship with their child. My mind has been in this vein of thinking of late.

I was reminded of a long drive last week where my mind wandered to thinking about my children and inwardly smiling (as they were in the backseat asleep) as I thought about something funny Jackson had done that day and longed to get home and cuddle up with Sam in our big chair. I thought, "Is it possible for me to love my children any more?" as my chest swelled with love and pride. Then a thought, not of my own, came to me, "Do you love the Lord more than you love your children?" (I also came to the conclusion that I could be guilty of being too proud of my children. I would hate to have to be humbled in that area because my pride has swelled to a sinful level.)

Immediately I shrunk down in the seat of my car as some examples came to me.

I always read a book to Jackson and later check on both boys before I go to sleep. Do I always read my scriptures and say goodnight to the Lord through prayer before I go to sleep?

My boys are in my constant thoughts - How can I be a better mother, a better teacher? Is the Lord in my constant thoughts? Do I actively look for ways to be a better daughter, a better learner?

I think about how to teach my children to love the Lord, serve Him, and build a relationship with him, but I don't always do that for myself.

I make sure my children are fed. Do I always feed His sheep?

Food for thought for me...

Elder Oaks talk went in a different direction but it got me thinking a lot. It was really good. Here is a link in case you didn't get to hear it.
http://lds.org/conference/talk/display/0,5232,23-1-1117-9,00.html

Making Progress...

2009-10-10T13:00:00.001-07:00

Yesterday I got into my favorite pair of jeans!!! (insert happy dance here) Two weeks ago I couldn't pull them up, and I still wouldn't wear them now without a really long sweater that covers my toosh, but the fact is...I got into them and buttoned them and they were wearable (cough...if I were a streetwalker, mumble, mumble).

I am doing good with working out, even tho now I can only work out after a long day and I am usually exhausted. I still somehow manage to get myself up to the gym and get in a workout about 3x a week. After all, it is usually the only me time I get all week long now that Ben is working at the hospital so much. I still have a few pounds to go to get back into the 140's, but I have given myself an ultimatum. Either get there before the end of October or drastic measures will have to be taken. I cannot afford to go buy new jeans and I can only fit decently into one or two pairs right now, so it is time to just get it done. Just Do It!! (to borrow a phrase from Nike and Pres Hinckley).

Another issue is this belly fat. It doesn't seem like it hung in there this long last time. Hmmm...Last time I did a lot more Pilates and I did 200 crunches a night with my ab roller while watching TV after I put Jack to bed, but now we have our bedroom TV in the loft instead and it is right outside Jack's bedroom. I'm afraid that would be too loud. Plus, it seems that with two kids, by the time I get them both down for the night, I am pooped myself and not really motivated to get on the ab roller. I'll have to figure out a new plan that works for me.

Anyway, little by little, I am making progress!

My Favorite Shows For Kids

2009-10-09T06:19:00.000-07:00

Every day we watch one of these shows when my preschoolers wake up from nap. They are both on PBS kids. SuperWhy is my favorite. It is a reading show featuring the "Super Readers" who solve problems based on stories found in favorite fairy tales and nursery rhymes. It focuses on several facets of reading, such as spelling, letter recognition, letter sounds, context clues, etc. It has catchy music and has several games during the show that the kids enjoy playing while they watch.

I think it is a great show for kids who are at any stage of reading. Young kids (ages 2-3) will enjoy recognizing the "super letters, " while older kids (4-5) enjoy figuring out the sounds and spelling words with Princess Pea. Even older kids (ages 6-8) would enjoy figuring out the super story answer and helping SuperWhy "zap" words to try to figure out how to help the characters with their problem.

Jackson LOVES this show! He will get up and dance around when he hears the theme song. Now, when we are out and he sees letters on billboards or signs or even on food packaging, he'll say, "You see the super letters, Mama?" It is so cute, and it gives me a teaching opportunity to say, "I see the super letters. What letters do you see?" Lately when he sees the show, he is beginning to be able to "spell" with Princess Pea. She will tell them what word they are going to make, and say, "What letter makes the sound rrrrr?" Jackson will holler out "R!" Now that he can recognize all the letters in the alphabet, we have been working on the sounds they make, but only minimally in the bathtub with his foam letters.

The other show is called Sid the Science Kid. The main character, Sid, is eternally curious about why and how things work. He discusses it with his parents, interviews his friends about what they know about the topic, and then brings his questions to school where "Teacher Susie" helps the class go through the scientific method to find out the answer. It has helped me get my group excited about Science. I admit I have never considered myself a science enthusiast or a great science teacher, but this show has helped me see how easy it can be to teach science, even to younger kids. This week in our apples unit, I decided that we were going to cut open an apple and observe how it changes. The kids have been very excited about it.

Anyway, just thought I'd share. If you haven't seen these shows, you ought to check them out. They get both my parent and teacher seal of approval!! ;)

Our Week with the Addster

2009-10-06T18:19:00.001-07:00

Addy and Keagan (my aunt Sara's grandson) making silly faces on Sara'a lap.
Jackson and Addy watering the flowers in Sara's backyard.

Addy's pudding face

Park fun

Riding the carousel at the zoo, Jackson's first carousel ride. He did NOT want to get off his horse.

I pushed the double stroller around at the zoo with Samson strapped to my chest. It was exhausting, but we all had so much fun!!

Something below them caught their attention more than the zebras in front of them.

Cheesing for the camera at the zoo.

Playing together in the playroom. These 2 kiddos were like 2 peas in a pod. Addy was a great big sister figure for Jackson; he hero-worshipped her and wanted to do whatever she was doing. She was kind and fair with him. It was sweet to see them get so close because they live 5 hours apart and don't see each other often.

See below for recent pics of Jackson and Samson...

Jack!!!

2009-10-06T17:37:00.001-07:00

Are you ready for some football?!! Jackson loves to watch football with his daddy, probably because it is an interactive experience. They tackle each other and do plays right in the living room.

Why is he wearing a Mr. Potato Head Santa beard, you might wonder? We wondered that for a while, too, until one day he was frantically looking for his "facemask" and couldn't find it. My goofy kid! Now he won't ever watch football with daddy without his football and his "facemask".

Jackson loves to swing on the big swings. He has been able to hold on and swing by himself (when I push him) since he was about 20 months, right before Sam was born. (Sorry about the dog butt shot, lol)

This is Jackson feeding the birds on our last zoo trip.

Stuffing his face with his favorite, Cheetos, on our zoo trip picnic with his cousin Addy.

And, strangely, my son has an obsession with shoes. These are K's "high heeled" (as she calls them) sandals. He put htem on all by himself and strutted proudly around in them before we even noticed how unusually shapely his calves looked.

See the next post for pics of Sam...

Sam!!!

2009-10-06T17:15:00.000-07:00

This is Jack's first Halloween costume. I put it on Sam to see if it would fit or if we needed to get a new costume. Jackson was 2 months when he wore this dragon costume, Sam is 4.5 mos. I got him in it, but it wouldn't zip up and Sam's feet were hanging out the bottom by a good 4 inches.
Pre-teething drool...This was such a funny face, but it came out blurry. This is how we will tell their baby pics apart. Sam always has his hand in his mouth, while Jackson was a pacifier baby until 6 mos when he decided he wanted nothing more to do with it. Sam rarely will take a pacifier. He prefers his hand. I think he'll be a thumb sucker, but he comes by it honestly. I still can't keep my hands out of my mouth. I am a nail biter.
Sam loves the Exersaucer. He babbles at the toys and reaches out for them. He likes to be facing the kids tho. He wants to be able to play AND see the action around him.

In the last 3 weeks or so, he has started to roll over from back to front and front to back. He now chooses to sleep on his tummy. I'm loving it because he sleeps deeper than way, and that means less interrupted sleep for ME! I thought this was a cute picture of him looking at the mirror on this toy.

Mother of 3

2009-09-24T12:39:00.000-07:00

This is an old pic, but I have only taken pics of Addy with my phone, none with my camera yet. I'll post more later when I get a chance.

I am a Mother of 3 this week because when I went home to Tulsa last weekend for Race for the Cure, I brought back my niece, Addison. This wasn't planned, but it was just me and Sam so we had room in the Jeep. Plus, I only have 4 kids enrolled right now, so I can handle one more. Addy is 4 and such a great helper! I'm kinda thinking about askin' Meg if she wants to trade cuz Jackson is driving me crazy today!!

It is sweet to see how much Jack hero-worships her and what a great "big sis" she is to him. In the evenings after his friends go home, Jackson gets lonely and always wants to come sit on our laps while we watch tv or hangs on me while I am cooking dinner, but with Addy here, he has a buddy to play with. I actually sat down and watched an episode of Friends on t.v. on Monday night and I wasn't even nursing!!

She is having a blast in my preschool this week. I asked her if she was ready to go home and she said, "Hmmm, no, but maybe my Mama and my Daddy can come here." Then today on the phone she asked her mom if she could stay one more day. On Saturday we are going to go to the library and the zoo, then on Sunday, after church, we will go out to my aunt Sara's house in Celina and she can play with Chris and Aubrey's boys, her other cousins (once-removed ?), Keagan and Levi. Then we'll head to Atoka to meet my mom and sis halfway to give her back.

This is the first time I have really gotten to spend extended quality time one-on-one with Addy. It is so fun to see how much she is like Megan was as a child. She even looks like Megan did when she was little. Dark blonde hair, long eyelashes, olive skin and she has so much spunk in her tiny 4 year old body!! I just LOVE her!!

Re-posting a draft...

2009-09-17T12:17:00.000-07:00

Before I had kids...
-I got a full night's sleep regularly.
-I could run to the store for a gallon of milk and back in 20 minutes.
-I could leave the house without coordinating nap and feeding schedules.
-I didn't have 10 loads of laundry to wash, dry, fold, hang up and put away every week.
-I never uttered the words, "potty," "poo-poo," or "pee-pee"
-I managed to make it a full day without a spot on my clothes.
-I had never been simulataneously pooped on and thrown up on.
-I didn't have to take a stuffed dalmation with me everywhere I went.
-My house stayed clean for days on end instead of hours.
-I only had one butt to wipe.
-I never had to dig a dead bug out of a toddler's mouth.
-I had never picked someone else's nose.
-I wore makeup everywhere.
-I only had one size of clothes in my closet

Just reflecting, not complaining.