Laughter is the Best Medicine

It is 1:15. Here are the events of the Blake household today so far. (yeesh) I'm scared to think what could come next...

Ben gets a flat tire on the way to school this morning. Apparently the tire had a piece of metal stuck in it. This wouldn't be so bad except that the roads in our area are icy. Many school districts are closed. Not mine (note the bitterness), but many. Unfortunately his school wasn't closed either.

Meanwhile, my day went fairly smoothly. I had all my kids except 2. A. stayed home because she had chemo last week and so her immune system is very weak this week. Several of the kids have nasty colds, and catching one could put her in the hospital, so...she's at home. S.M. stayed home because she, too, was in the hospital last week for several days with a nasty respiratory infection - viral. She was isolated in a clean room and everything. None of the other kids got that thankfully. So I had 5 and Jackson.

I was supposed to have an appointment in Lake Worth this afternoon. I was going to take Jackson with me, and Mrs. Olivia was going to come sub for me, but at noon I decided to cancel because I didn't want to get out in this weather. Plus, Ben called and said he was going to get the tire fixed after school (how did he manage to wait that long?) and he didn't know how long that would take, so I had to reschedule my appt. Normally, I would take the Neon, but Sunday the Neon wouldn't start. It's a battery issue, but neither of us have had a chance to deal with it yet, so we are down to the Jeep and yes, the Jeep got a flat tire.

Moving on. Lunchtime. This is the craziest time of the day on ANY day. I am simultaeously trying to open food packages, cancel my appointment, cancel my sub, get Jackson to eat his lunch and not throw it on the floor, play games with the other kids to get them to eat as well (Games include who is going to be the lunch champion today and get to pick the naptime movie OR one-two-three take a bite all at the same time and see who gets done first. Neglecting a lunchtime game results in 1.5 hour lunches.), and K. starts coughing.

She is probably the kid who has the worst cold of all. She has been fighting it for about 3 weeks now. She has been to the dr. twice and the emergency room once. Her cough is dry and non-productive, yet you can hear the mucus clogging her up when she talks and breaths. So...she breaks out into a ten-minute coughing fit. She can't breathe, she is crying, she starts throwing up. I guide her to the bathroom, but don't follow her in because I need to get her a glass of water. (She has already had one, but drank it all. It didn't help.)

Her choice of receptacle? The bathroom sink. Gross. It is bad.

So now I am on the phone trying to call her mom - no answer, and her dad (who just started a new job this week) - no answer.

Than Z.'s mom picks him up (he is a half day kid). As kids often do, Z. stars getting silly and not sticking too close to our lunchtime rules. While she is also on the phone (she is a hospice nurse who sends nurses out via phone), Z. decides it would be a great idea to start a game of tag. SO now I have one kid in the bathroom puking, Jackson crying to get up and throwing his food on the floor, three kids chasing each other around the kiddie tables, and one blessed child sitting calmly and continuing to eat her lunch. I bark at all the kids to sit down and eat, go check on K., still not able to get a full breath, but doing better. Her dad calls me back - he will send Uncle to come get her, it's bad weather anyway...

Skip ahead to post-lunch process. Z. and his mom are gone, kids are a little calmer, K. no longer coughing, but not hungry after the puking. Kids all go potty (in the process Jackson gets in the bathroom and plays with K's puke, still in the sink - haven't gotten a chance to wash it down yet. GROSS!) wash their hands and J's THOROUGHLY), and get on their beds. We are watching a movie, waiting for K.'s uncle to come get her, so we can't turn the naptime CD on yet. It is close to an hour past time to be settled in for nap, but at least I got the kitchen all cleaned up and the kids on their beds.

K's uncle arrives, takes K. home, I turn on the naptime CD, change Jackson's diaper, get him in bed. AAH, naptime begins. (3 kids left out of the 5 I started with today.)

NOPE. A. suddenly needs to go potty again. Poop this time. Which makes S.B. (who is potty training - weakness is #2) instantly remember she needs to poop, too. They both go and wash hands and get back on beds. Now L. says his tummy hurts, and he needs to poop, too. Oh no, I say, not believing him. He was the last of the first rounds of pottiers, so I'm thinking they're all just being turkeys. I go finish cleaning up. I also start dinner - beans (and cornbread and a hamsteak). I'm taking dinner to my VT sister who is not in good health today.

Few minutes later, L. is crying on his bed. I go check on him. Tummy really hurts, he says. Okay, I say, exasperated. We make it to the lineleoum of the kitchen right outside the bathroom. BLAHHH! Peanut butter sandwich and Oreo puke everywhere. (sigh)

On the kitchen floor, all over the bathroom door, all over the baseboards, all over the bathroom rug. (double sigh) Guess I know what I'll be doing all of naptime.

Now I feel bad, should have believed him. So I get him cleaned up, he seems fine now, says his tummy is all better, let him go get on his bed. L. passes out immediately. Bonus! I think, L. fights naptime everyday!

I go clean the bathroom and the floor. wipe up, mop, disinfect, clean rest of the beathroom, clorox wipes all the doorknobs and the kiddie chairs, bag up his clothes, call his mom - no answer, his stepdad - no answer. At least we made it to the lineoleum, I think. At least he didn't puke on the carpet.

Stepdad calls me back about 20 min later - on his way. I hear L. stirring. Uh-oh, I think. Go into the playroom, he opens his eyes. Doesn't look good. I'm racing for hte trashcan. Lying on his back, he begins to throw up and it is a lot, and he begins to choke on it. He isn't turning over. I race to him, turn him over into the trashcan, walk him to the bathroom again.

Strip him down, wipe him down, change his clothes again. This time I have to clean up the carpet, his naptime bed, his blanket, his pillow. (sigh) Stepdad gets here.

And then there were 2.

A.'s mom always picks her up during naptime, so she'll be here soon. S.'s mom calls me a few minutes later. She picked up S's sis from school early, so she's on her way to get S., too. And I have run out of kids at 3:00. I close at 5:30.

All I can do is laugh that this all happened in one day!

Pros:

I'm off early.
L. and K. can't return until at least 2:30 tomorrow due to the 24 hr puke-free rule, and A. probably won't be here either, so tomorrow will be an easy day.
My bathroom is super-sparkly clean, even the baseboards.
I have time to make sure dinner is ready to take to the VT sister.
This whole incident didn't happen when Mrs. Olivia was here. (I canceled my appt.)
Ben came home early.
At least Jackson slept through the night last night and no diarrhea from him today. His cold is getting better, too.
A. stayed home and so was not exposed to the germs floating around today.
Cons:

I have cashed 2 brownies and 2 mini ice cream sandwiches since.
I have a lovely brown spot on the carpet I can't get out.
I have to deep clean the downstairs so none of the other kids get sick.
My house smells like burned plastic because I put some of the toys in the dishwasher and one fell onto the heating element at the bottom of the dishwasher.