The musings of ME:
SAH mother of 3 kids, spouse of a doctor-in-residency, caretaker and teacher of random children.

Thursday, October 15, 2009


What do you do when a person you love is in a tough spot and needs help? They spiral downward and downward and know what to do to get themselves back on track, but won't. You can't say anything because they already know what to do, but for some reason they don't have the faith they need to believe that it WILL work. They are looking for a way to make it work all by themselves, and they don't want to hear that from you of all people. They just get more and more frustrated and sink lower and lower and things get harder and harder. You get to the point where you don't know how to help them, support them anymore. They have to figure it out on their own, but you are afraid they'll hit rock bottom before that happens, and THAT is just no good for anyone involved. So do you say something in the interest of all parties who will be affected or do you let them keep sinking, dragging everyone else down with them? Right now my plan is to pray, earnestly and continuously. Hey, it worked for me, maybe my prayers can work miracles, too.


I have a good life said...

Thank-you so much for your comment. I am sorry my life makes me relive yours...but I am glad to know that strong women have been here and made it out. I wish so much that I could not see him again...with the kids it is constant scheduling. All the time.

As far as what to do with your person you love. It hurts so much. It hurts that they can't see the big picture that you can with the eyes of faith and the gospel. I know my in-laws are struggling so much with this with their son.

Prayer is a great miracle-worker and a great answer for it is something you absolutely CAN do. Good luck. I hurt for that heartache since it is so hard to see ones you love suffer because of their choices but not be able or willing to change and come to where there is peace and happiness.

Kirsten said...

FIrst off this post hit home with me more than anyone is even aware of!! So trust me when I say, I am right there with you!!
There are things that I've decided, when it comes to this person, I HAVE to trust in the Lord; the only hard part is that WHEN/IF it starts to effect you and your family in any hurtful way, you HAVE to protect them and sever all connected ties! It is better to let them fall on their own than pull your family down with them! Prayer truly is a great miracle, and DOES grants "wishes" (so to speak) when the person offering the prayer does it with pure intentions instead of selfish ones!! Depending on the situation I would say that prayer, along with continued love, kindness, and faith, WILL eventually help this person..... if they desire to be helped! Unfortunately you are not the person to save him/her if they do not want to be saved :(
Again, I speak from current experience and all I can say is.... if you need to call me I'm here :) I'll keep you in my prayers, luvs!!

marcia@joyismygoal said...

yes definitely prayers and hugs! and little encouraging messages of love sent are never unwanted

Shana said...

I, as you well know, have personal experience in this department. What I know is that you can't "save" anyone else but yourself. We all have to work out our own salvation. All you can do is love them and pray for their well being and that God will work His miracles in their lives.
The biggest thing that I remember when in this situation, was the great examples in my life. The people who were my "rocks" through everything. They NEVER wavered in their beliefs or their faith. With time, that spoke in volumes.
I am a firm believer that God blesses His children who follow Him and love Him. When we do what the Lord asks of us, He grants us our pure hearts desire. (sometimes it just takes a lot longer than we would like)
On the other hand, Kirsten is right, if the situation becomes unhealthy or has long negative effects on the family members involved. There needs to be some consequences to that. We as mothers have a responsibility to our children and their well being. If that is compromised by someone, we need to remove that someone.
Simple to say, but yet hard to do.
I wish you luck my friend. XOXO